Dating a Divorced Man

Should you date a divorced man? I get this question all the time. People are concerned that the guy is going to have too much baggage.

Well, if he’s been on this planet long enough he’s going to have some baggage anyway and it might not just be because of his bitter divorce…

What matters is what he’s done to deal with the end of his marriage. Has he gone to therapy? Can he have a mature conversation about his divorce? Does he understand why the relationship ended?

It’s really easy to spot a divorced man who hasn’t done his emotional work. He blames his “crazy” ex-wife for the divorce without having a clear understanding of why it ended. It takes two to tango, and it’s important for all of us to learn from our past relationships. If he exempts himself from all blame in his divorce, he will probably make the same mistakes again. You’ll be the next “crazy” person he dates.

Tread wisely and lightly. Pay attention to how he talks about his divorce and make sure he’s ready and in the right emotional place for a new relationship.

The good news is that a divorced man isn’t just another bachelor floating around. He had a committed relationship even if it didn’t work out with his ex-wife. Who’s to say it won’t work out between the two of you?

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