Fetish Spotlight: Male Chastity

Chastity blog sex with emily

Chastity blog sex with emilyIf you have never heard of “male chastity” let me fill you in…

Generally “male chastity” refers to controlling a male-identifying partner’s sexual activities. 

This control occurs either through a device, a power dynamic, or plain control by one person over the genitalia for sexual pleasure.

Sounds fun, right?

Locktober” is coming up. If you don’t know what this is, it’s where men put on chastity cage for the entire month of October. This makes the season a great time to explore this kink or fetish.


What is “Enforced Chastity” and Why Are People into it?

Enforced chastity means one person is controlling the sexual activity of another. This usually occurs by locking their penis in a device like a chastity belt. Most people are into it for the appeal of playing with power dynamics. Some people prefer to be under the control of their partners. Even a stranger can be given the control over a partner’s sexual release, if desired.

The dominant partner can control where, how, and when a submissive or slave is allowed to experience sexual release. Usually, when wearing a chastity belt or cage, the wearer experiences sexual frustration. This also a desirable part of the kink.

This kind of power play can be fun in many types of relationships. One married couple found that incorporating male chastity into their marriage helped spice up their sex life.


What is a chastity belt or cock cage?

A chastity cage (or penis cage) is a specific metal device used to, well, cage up a penis.

They’re typically used in a BDSM dynamic . One partner wears the device and the other partner holds the key to it. The person who holds the key is referred to as the “keyholder” and the wearer is generally a “submissive” or “slave”. 

They consist of a ring around the base of the penis with a tube or cage enclosing the penis, connected together with a hinge or pin. This design prevents any kind of jerking off (am I losing some fellas here?).

Some cages even have shorter designs intended to restrict the penis length and squeeze it into a smaller shape. But others, like this one, allow for an erection to simply fill up the cage. Some even go so far to prevent masturbation by including genital piercing. Ouch!

Here’s a fun cage tip: if you are the keyholder, you can have your male partner lie back with the chastity cage on his penis. Insert a butt plug, and then use a massager or vibrator on the perineum. He can start to feel his orgasm build and after about 5 to 6 minutes cum might start to ooze out, but he will still feel on the edge of orgasm that will never come.


The benefits of male chastity

It may be difficult for some people to understand why anyone would want to deny themselves or their partner pleasure. But people who are into this kink tout the many benefits.

These benefits include creating a deep bond between partners through the dominant/submissive dynamic. Also, it allows the two partners to feel more connected when physically apart. Male chastity can bring back the courtship phase, increase intimacy, and result in the male partner being more engaged in the day to day of the relationship.

Some keyholders like to wear the key somewhere intimate, like inside their panties or around their necks hanging between their breasts. There is a freedom and control involved they may have never had before. Holding the key can be a powerful act of dominance and connection.


Safety and consent

While all this sounds fun and dandy, it is important to take precautions in order to prevent any harm (psychologically or physically) to the submissive. Restricting a penis in male chastity must ALWAYS be accompanied by full and free consent.

There is a risk of penile strangulation due to too much restriction of blood flow to the penis. All participants must take precaution not to lose the key to the cage/device. Sometimes the lock is located in a sensitive area so to have it removed without the key can cause damage.

A wearer might undergo certain psychological repercussions that attend restricted sexual release. As such, the keyholder must check in regularly with the caged partner. Are they getting what they want out of the fetish? Are they still in a state that allows for full and free consent on the duration of the chastity?

This fetish a good area where written consent or contracts can help. In addition, the dominant should give proper aftercare, which should be negotiated from before the chastity event.


So, if you’re ready to “lock and load”, consider having a talk with your partner or someone you trust to try it with. You may find that exploring male chastity opens new doors in your sex play.


Emily Anne is a bestselling author, sex coach and educator, who specializes in helping people expand their sexual horizons through BDSM and kink. When she’s not obsessively talking about sex, she’s hiking through the Hollywood Hills. Get some sexy education on her Instagram feed
Related Posts