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article-2291280-188E2ECB000005DC-807_634x800“Dear Emily,

I recently started dating a guy (a great guy, actually!) and things are going really well. There’s only one problem… I’m afraid to have sex with him! We’ve been seeing each other for almost two months now and we still haven’t done the deed. It’s not that I’m not attracted to him or that I’m afraid he won’t respect me. The real reason is that I am pretty sure I’m bad in bed.

I’ve only been with two guys, and neither seemed to be that into the sex. One of them looked downright bored! I like this new guy a lot and would really like to wow him in the sack, but now I’m extremely self-conscious. What if we have sex and it’s terrible and he doesn’t want to date me anymore? I need help! How do I know if I’m terrible at sex? And more importantly, how can I fix it?

Sincerely,
BIB, 24

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Screen Shot 2015-11-12 at 11.59.12 AMHi Emily,

I have a concern about something that has been happening when my boyfriend and I have sex. When we are having a longer sex session (past 30 minutes) I’ve noticed that I tend to dry out, even though I was extremely wet a few minutes before. And what’s worse, it becomes extremely uncomfortable. Is it possible that I could run out of my own juices? I mean, I’m only 22! This has really been affecting my sex life, because I take a longer time to orgasm during intercourse, and my boyfriend usually takes a while also. Is this normal? What should I do?

 

Thanks,

Kate

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23ee19a9b887f4ee7af229e2977f6619Q: Dear Emily,

Thanks to you, I am now a woman with several sex toys. I have recently fallen in love with my Magic Wand vibrator, and it has totally changed things for me in that I can now not only orgasm, but have multiple orgasms! But now I’m wondering.. Is it bad that I only ever want to use my vibrator to masturbate? The things is, I’ve heard rumors about vibrators actually desensitizing the clitoris, and now I’m worried that I’m ruining my vagina! Is this true? Whenever I go back to using my hands, it takes SO long to get there and I’m not even sure if I’m climaxing. Has it already started? Am I addicted to my vibrator? Help!

Sincerely,
Vibrator Obsessed, 22

 

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0ab38cb90c6c2432daa4b06dc01c22ddDear Emily,

Lately I have found myself not that interested in sex, and I think I know why. My long-time boyfriend and I have very busy schedules, and we don’t have as much time as we used to in the bedroom. As a result, all of our sex sessions end up being what you might call “quickies”. He is totally happy to get in, get out and move on to the next thing, but these interactions just aren’t satisfying for me. So now when he brings up the idea of sex, I make excuses or try to get out of it.

I’ve tried explaining my feelings to him, but he just doesn’t get it. He thinks that I’m not interested in him sexually, but that’s not the case – I just feel like I need more! Am I being totally unreasonable? What can we do to make sex enjoyable again, for both of us?

Sincerely,

Sick of Quickies

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Q:

Dear Emily,

I have a confession: I hate giving blow jobs.

The first and last real time that I tried going down on a guy, it was horrible. He smelled really bad down there, and when I tried to just power through it, he pushed my head down and I gagged. He lost his erection and we never hooked up again. Ever since then, I’ve avoided giving BJ’s at all costs.

Now, I’m with a really good guy who is so kind and loving to me. He has made it known that he really LOVES getting blow jobs (even more than sex!) and I really want to give him one, but I keep thinking back to that bad experience. How do I get over my oral sex fears and give him the amazing blow job he deserves?

Sincerely,

Amanda

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Dear Emily,

I am very educated about sexual health and open minded sexually, but I have a hard time accepting my boyfriend’s porn habit. I thought that our sex life was great, and we love trying new things and experimenting, but he still reverts back to his favorite XXX videos. I can’t help wondering… Aren’t I enough?

I’ve seen porn before, and I get that all guys watch it, but I can’t help feeling a little insecure. Is he comparing me to the women in his favorite pornos? I don’t know what to do to accept the habit.  It isn’t fair for me to ask him to stop, so how can I get used to it? Help!

Thanks.
Marie

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