Closing the Orgasm Gap
As a sex and relationship expert, I’ve advised millions of couples (and singles) who listen to my podcast hoping to enhance intimacy and improve their sex lives. If you have a question about a particular sexual issue or experience, I’m certain I’ve covered it. After a decade of doing my podcast, there is one topic that comes up over and over again: the dissatisfaction that occurs when one partner climaxes before the other.
Enter the orgasm gap, or in the simplest sense, the physiological difference in the time it takes for men and women to climax (on average, 5 and 18 minutes, respectively). When it comes to arousal, men are like frying pans while women are more like slow cookers. We heat up at different speeds, yet we expect to be equally satisfied by our shared sexual encounters. Also, we differ in the way we become aroused. For guys, the penis is pretty much running show because, if it’s getting attention, arousal is generally guaranteed. For women, arousal requires more of a top-down approach, and no, I’m not talking about the breasts (although it never hurts to give them some love). I’m referring to the largest female sex organ: that big, sexy brain.
Yet despite the fact that we know we’re wired differently, the orgasm gap is still the cause of many relationship and sexual issues because we don’t know how to address it properly.