What Type of Playboy is Your Zodiac Sign?

Image via Tumblr- Artist Unknown.

Have you ever wondered what the ‘typical playboy’ of your zodiac sign is? Today we find out!

Every astrological sign has it’s good and bad aspects, it’s light and shadows. No one sign is perfect, and no one sign is completely flawed. I’m exploring the romantic and sexual shadows of each sign to expose the classic ‘fuckboi’ of each sign.

Also, you can have any gender expression and sexual identity and still be a fuckboi. It’s just symbolic of the shadow aspect of your sign. Gender roles are boring and limiting. These lothario archetypes have personality traits that can apply to anyone. 

If you’re new to astrology, feel free to just look up your sun sign. If you’re more experienced in the astrological realm, you may enjoy looking up your Venus and Mars positions, as these rule your sex and romance zones.

 

 

Aries: The Hunter

The Aries fuckboi has a loud voice, strong personality, and usually a strong body to match. They are bold, ambitious, assertive, and most of all they love to be numero uno. They love the thrill of the chase, and will pursue you with intensity and vigor. This level of energy isn’t sustainable though, and once they catch you, they lose interest. 

When they do win you into bed, they will usually take charge and ravish you with some fun (but emotionless) sex. Not the kinkiest, but will give you a solid pounding. Regardless if that style is your sexual preference, that’s what’s on the menu. Chefs choice.

They are there for a good time, not a long time, and once they get their nut, they’re out. Sorry, you’re not going to be considered in their decisions, they’re just there for some fun.

via GIPHY

Taurus: The Lavish

The Taurean fuckboi is kinda arrogant, but with enough to back it up that you can’t help finding it charming. They will usually give you a pretty chill ‘I just want a friends-with-benefits’ vibe. They aren’t as aggressive in their pursuit of you as an Aries is, so they might catch you a little off guard.

If they don’t have much money, they will try and use you for yours. If they do, they’ll enjoy showing it off and lavishing you. 

They are indulgent and love to immerse all their senses. They adore treats and feel they deserve a lot of them. You’re a treat to them, the sex is, the food is, it all is. They are usually great in bed, they are sensual lovers who have luxury sheets. Actually, their whole bed set up is usually a cozy luxe paradise. 

You’ll be allowed to sleep over, and they might even wake you up with some morning sex, before going out to breakfast together (tbh they are kinda lazy and don’t want to cook). They are usually good people deep down, but don’t like being close to themselves or others. So they will disappear the minute you get too close to them. But at least you’ll have the memory of how nice their bed was to keep you warm at night. 

via GIPHY

Gemini: The Intellectual

Gemini fuckbois are intelligent, but not as smart as they think they are (and they definitely think they’re smarter than you). They are witty and funny, and you’ll have epic banter with them in no time. I hope you like obscure arthouse movie references and fixed gear bikes, because Gemini’s are the hipster fuckbois. They like to act like they don’t care about anything, but they really do. The type to spend 2 hours making their hair look like they just rolled out of bed.

Once you starting chatting, you will feel super connected to them, like you’re the only person in the room. Maybe even the whole world. That conversation continues in the bedroom because they love dirty talk and are excellent at it. They can get a little kinky in bed if the mood is right, and bring you out of your shell emotionally and sexually, but then they leave you on read after you bone. 

They won’t ghost you, but they will only hit you up whenever they want, and it will be sporadic. Geminis need everything on their own terms. The sex was good though, so against your better judgement, you respond to their text. When you do see them, it’s right back to how it was before, feeling so connected. But quick as you know, they are gone again. When they do cut things off for good,  they will likely quote some Bukowski to you via text as an excuse for their shitty behavior. Sigh. 

via GIPHY

Cancer: The Tender

Cancer fuckbois are a sneaky breed. They have a very unassuming appearance, often with a pretty normcore clean-cut look. Looks can be deceiving, and they seem like a regular person at first (i.e. not a fuckboi) so they will catch you off guard with their tomfoolery. They are moody as all heck, but they will seem very chill and even keel at first.

Excellent listeners, you’ll feel an instant connection, like they already know you. Anticipating all your needs, they meet them effortlessly. You can look forward to some slow, connected, eye gazing sex. They will sleep with you a few times before you realize you don’t really know anything about them, but they get super bristly and disappear when you try to get to know them.

They can be emotionally manipulative, read into everything you say and do, and can’t resist playing the victim. Cancers are actually really tender-hearted, but stay closed off to protect themselves. When it does end, you might be a little confused and feel it was somehow your fault. It wasn’t. 

Oh, and by the way, they are definitely still hung up on their ex.

via GIPHY

Leo: The Stagehog

Leo lotharios are almost always physically attractive, and they sure know it. Which kinda makes them less attractive, but you’ll be enamored at first. Very confident, super charismatic and charming, they are tied with Librans as the flirt champs. You’ll be so captivated by their gregarious personality that like a fly in a spiders web, you’re inextricably drawn in before you even realized.

They might neg you a little bit to keep you on your toes, and remind you that they are the bee’s knee’s and you’re just lucky to be with them. Bummer alert: The sex is super anticlimactic and all about them, they just wanna hear how good they are, because at their core they are very insecure.

They leave the minute it’s over, saying “you’re welcome for the best sex of your life”. Whomp whoooomp. They might hit you up every now and then afterward, but it’s not to actually see you or connect, they just want the ego boost of knowing you’re still into them. 

via GIPHY

Virgo: The conflicted

Not a common lothario sign. It might happen if they sort of lucked into sleeping with you, or they were so focused on other areas of their lives that they forgot about sex and got all pent up.

Attentive and devoted, detail oriented. Seem super sweet, and super into you. They would try to make sure you had a good time, but it’s kinda anti-climactic when you do get between the sheets. The type to be texting you bomb kinky stuff, but then panic and just give you some missionary and fall asleep. 

They don’t like confrontation so they will definitely ghost you afterward. They are very judgemental and will judge themselves for having casual sex. The worse news is they kinda judge you too. They would feel super guilty about the whole thing, and you might even get a text a few years later apologizing. I wouldn’t hold your breath though…

via GIPHY

Libra: The Charmer

Probably one of the biggest proponents of fuck boi behavior in the entire wheel of the zodiac. They ooze natural charm, a gift from their Venus ruler, plus they are usually good looking and charismatic. The charm is balanced by how chill they are, so your guard won’t be up. They don’t aggressively pursue you, it’s less about ego for them, and more about wanting to connect with you and enjoying the feeling of charming you. Librans are so smooth, you’ll have no idea they are playing you.

They can be very romantic and will make some cute gestures, but just enough to get you hooked. A Libran really wants to be liked by all, and they usually are. Typically they’re good in bed. Very. They will adapt to what you like and give you a great time.

While at their core they do actually want a partnership, they are huge commitmentphobes due to their indecisive nature. They hate conflict and will definitely ghost you. Once they out, they out. In fact, they are already on to the next, sorry. 

 

Scorpio: The Tortured

Scorpio fuckbois want you to think they are very troubled souls, but the truth is they usually just need some self-awareness and a few therapy sessions. They definitely want to get to know your soul,  because they are very curious creatures. Super mysterious these scorpions, they won’t tell you anything about themselves though. 

They are not aggressive in pursuing you, in fact, they will likely warn you against it. Which just makes you want them more. Contrary to most fuckboi’s, they are usually pretty direct that they are players, but in this charming self-deprecating, bad boy way that just makes you want to turn them good. You can’t, don’t try. Ah you’re going to do it anyway, aren’t you? 

Well, you’re in for a kinky wild night of passion, with maybe even some sex magic. You won’t feel entirely feel safe and secure with them, but you’ll kind of like that dangerous feeling…

They won’t ghost you, but you can’t control them either, they will just swan in and out of your bedroom as they see fit. They can be low-key possessive and suspicious, which is outrageous because tbh you are just one out of many in their rotation. You’ll give up eventually because they rarely change their ways, but you can’t say they didn’t warn you. 

via GIPHY

Sagittarius: The Adventurer 

Sagittarius fuckboi’s will disarm you with their endearing, confident, and downright hilarious personality. They’ll laugh the pants right off you. In fact, you probably had sex the night you met, maybe not even managing to make it indoors before it happened.

They are assertive and they take charge in bed, if you’re into that, the sex will be great. If you’re not, well that’s too bad coz that’s how they role.

They go really hot and cold on you, keeping you guessing and uncertain as to how they feel. They need adventure and excitement, and are very flighty and hard to pin down. If you can give them their space, they will probably breeze back into your life for a booty call when they are in town. The minute they feel like it’s getting committed… they are like dust in the wind. 

via GIPHY

Capricorn: The utilitarian 

Bossy and uptight, this isn’t a common fuckboi sign. They are super hard on themselves, and on their partners. They are very shut off, and it’s hard to get to know them, but don’t worry they won’t even let you try. Often emotionally detached, they aren’t very deceptive people, they’re too busy for that. All their businesses and aloofness might draw you in though, you want to impress them and get them to open up. You probably can’t and they probably won’t.

Capricorns are often too busy to get into a lothario habit, so if you do meet one, they are usually focused on sex in a pretty utilitarian way. They work too much to have time for a relationship, so they see you as just some unattached fun to blow off steam with. They will probably be pretty honest about this, so don’t get it twisted and think it’s something it isn’t. 

If you do have sex it will likely be a bit hard and fast, remember, they are here to get their needs met. It’s a rare Cap that can trust easily, but if you’re chill and also want a casual hook up buddy, you just might have a solid ‘friends with bennies’ situation on your hands. Otherwise, you’re gonna get ghosted baby. If you do catch feelings or want commitment, don’t dabble with a Capricorn fuckboi. You’ll end up feeling like you played yourself.

via GIPHY

Aquarius: The alien

Super unique and ethereal, Aquarians are otherworldly. They spend a lot of time in their heads and can be kinda detached. Emotionally, but also from our human reality. Aquarians are not usually super motivated by sex. They like contemplating the universe and the meaning of life. They don’t want to Netflix and chill, they want to X-files and doggy style.

If they are into you sexually, then they are probably just into you sexually. They are super intuitive and fascinating lovers, if they ever let you get close enough to them. Open minded and down to do some kinky shit with you, you’ll certainly have an interesting sexual experience.

Ultimately they will probably lose interest fairly quickly, and it’s not even personal, they are just onto something else in their brain. Which they think is the most fascinating place to be. They are usually artists, and you best believe they will use their art as an excuse for being shitty. 

via GIPHY

Pisces: The soft

 I hope you like amusement parks, because you’re in for the emotional rollercoaster of your lifetime. They will absolutely love bomb you, create super intensity between you,  have some fantastic sex with you, then break up with you, all within a few days… even though you were never actually dating.

The best part is that this whole thing will feel like your fault, because they are skilled manipulators. They probably got you on their hook by making you feel maternal with some self-pitying reveals about themselves.

Pisces are the masters of writing you romantic poems in the morning, and then treating you like crap by the afternoon. Most Pisces fuckbois are sort of like nerds that got hot, and don’t really know what to do about it. These softbois aren’t as kind as they seem, and while you arrived for some Netflix and chill, you’ll be leaving after a Spotify and cry.

via GIPHY


Isabella Frappier is an Australian ex-pat living in LA, who swapped gumtrees for palm trees. She’s a writer and a holistic Sexuality Doula, who specializes in body literacy and sexual sovereignty. She is also a host on the popular new Sex Magic Podcast. When she’s not busy championing her sex positive agenda, she—oh wait—she’s always busy doing that. Follow her adventures on Instagram.

 

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