While knowing how to please yourself might seem almost like a primitive skill that you’re supposed to be born with, for a lot of women it’s the opposite. In fact, many women reach adulthood believing that thinking, talking about or even exploring the wide world of masturbation is taboo.

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Nobody wants to say they met their boo on a stupid dating app. For whatever reason, our culture still associates dating apps with desperation. But here’s the thing: sure, it’d be nice to meet people in person like the good old days when grandpa rode to school on a donkey and your friends actually looked at you instead of their phones when you had conversations, but those days are over. So get with the program, y’all. The survival of our species has always depended on adaptation and willingness to change.

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As we celebrate Masturbation May, it’s important to recognize why self-pleasure is so important. Of course this month is all about loving yourself with the goal of an earth-shattering climax, but it’s also about recognizing that masturbation is a healthy and wonderful expression of your amazing sexual self. Masturbation May is also the perfect time to show your lover exactly what feels best for you and your body, and to see what makes your partner hot too. So let’s jump in the shower for our six hottest tips on how to get dirty with some good, clean, masturbation fun. 

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We here at Sex With Emily are noticing a trend: you love to talk about threesomes and swinging! We fully support an adventurous sex life, but there are some dos and don’ts to the ins and outs of bringing a stranger into the mix. On today’s show, Emily is joined by show-favorite, Menace, and the two are setting the record straight on all things sex, dating, and masturbation by answering your emails and taking your calls!

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There are things that everyone does—like grocery shopping, sleeping, working—that are subjects we can share about, those mundane yet anecdotal experiences that are relatable. We commiserate on life with one another and it somehow makes it all less boring or lonely. But there are other things that we all do, too—crying, dealing with death, feeling insecure—that are just harder to talk about. Masturbation falls into that latter category.

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From day one as an only child, it was all about ME: my toys, my clothes, my world and ultimately my body. When puberty hit, it became all about ME time; a contemplation and reflection space with a piece of equipment that I suddenly understood after discovering a missing chapter in its user’s manual. An interlude to explore and indulge in any and every twist and turn of a sexual fantasy world that was vertically and horizontally expanding faster than West LA. Yes, there was a little shame in the 15 seconds after planting my flag at the summit, but by and large I felt entitled to this pursuit in the same way many feel about firearms and pedestrian right-of-ways. “I’m doing this and it’s gonna get done. Try and stop me.” Continue Reading

Q: DEAR EMILY,

My boyfriend and I broke up about six months ago, but we’re still living together (we don’t want the expense of breaking our lease, and where we live is very seasonal so it’s hard to find new tenants). He ended things because he was going through some personal stuff and wanted to work on himself. The problem is that we never stopped having sex.

Things started up again casually, where it was just hot and random, but I’ve noticed that lately he has started to bring some feelings back into it and I am finding that I too still have feelings for him. He is very intimate, cupping my face, telling me that he loves me. Then going out with friends and acting single. He’s very back and forth about it. I’m totally confused.

I don’t know if this is normal, or maybe he still wants to be with me? Is it possible to have a “friend with benefits” with an ex?

Brittany, 24,
New Jersey  Continue Reading

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