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Just the Tip

I believe it was Selena Gomez (or Emily Dickenson) who famously wrote, “The heart wants what it wants…” And I think the same can be said of the clitoris. Think about it, this once seemingly mythic organ exists solely for pleasure, it contains 8,000 delicious nerve endings, and it can be the most surefire path to orgasm. Of course it wants what it wants! What we need to do now is listen to it. Continue Reading

Solo or with a partner, achieving orgasm is like the pot of gold at the end of a sexy rainbow. But what happens when that rainbow of toys, foreplay, and sex doesn’t quite bring you all the way to your big ‘O’? As much as we would love to sit back, relax, and let our partners take care of all the hard climactic work, our orgasms are our responsibility. Although it’s your partner that helps get you there, they can’t do it alone, they need you– body AND mind. Whether you’re on the struggle bus with orgasming in general, or are experiencing a temporary lag in your typically dependable climax, here are a few tips to take control of every orgasm-oriented experience for a satisfying slide into that big ole’ pot of pleasure. 

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You’ve done it! After a few nights out with your new love interest, you’ve successful made it all the way to the bedroom. Things are getting hot and heavy as you continue to passionately make out with your partner. It’s completely dark. You dance your way onto the bed, getting a little lost in the moment. You’re right on the edge of the bed, so close to engaging in activities you’ve been dreaming up all evening. Here’s the challenge: getting your partner undressed. Why? You see by touching with your hands– you’re blind.

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Every straight woman I know has faked an orgasm. Some still do!

Girl, stop.

I’ve never been the When-Harry-Met-Sally kind of faker, but I’ve definitely moaned here and there and lied right to a guy’s face as he pealed the condom off and asked me if I came. It’s no surprise women do it, though. We’re raised in a culture that teaches us to revolve our lives entirely around men and their comfort, and sex is no different. Faking it is our way of helping them feel good about themselves– a call of duty if you will. Or it’s a way to not hurt their feelings when we’re tired, over it, or rubbed raw and just want him to get the f*ck off of us.  Continue Reading

First thing’s first, lesbian sex is sex, is sex, is sex— nuanced for each person, relationship, and occasion. Lesbian sex can entail mutual masturbation or oral sex. It can be a festive polyamorous party or an old married couple doing their best to keep the flames of desire aglow after the kids go off to college.  Every woman and trans-woman, regardless if she identifies as boi, butch, alpha, bi, unicorn, diesel, lipstick, queer, or another “type,” carries with her the same complex sexuality and sensuality all females share. Since the dawn of human sexuality studies, one fact about a woman’s desire remains constant… it’s always changing.

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Everything changes when you become a mom. Your body, your heart, your brain and your libido. It’s a top to bottom overhaul of the things that used to matter, the way you spend your time and money and your ability to remember your own name. You talk about yourself in the third-person using a generic label, and where your ass used to be is now just one long thigh. Your formerly sexy, confident and self-care focused self has left the building, and in her place is someone who cuts her own hair and has 3-week-old string cheese in her purse.  

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Masturbation has always been a touchy subject in relationships. How exactly do you go about it when you’re having sex on a regular basis? Does masturbating mean that you aren’t that into your partner? Does it mean your partner doesn’t satisfy your needs? What if one partner does it all the time and the other has never even tried?

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Masturbation and sex. Two acts so closely related, so immensely scrutinized and so loved by everyone around the planet. Many of us have long enjoyed both pleasure-filled encounters, but some of us let masturbation fall by the wayside—especially when we’re in a relationship. If you can have sex, why bother to masturbate?

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