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Is Knowing What You Want Sexy or SelfishQ: DEAR EMILY,

I was dating a guy who was great in bed. The first time we hooked up, he asked me what my fantasy was—I told him, we went with it and it was really hot. As we continued to date, he kept asking me what my fantasies were, so then I thought that the ones I had already shared weren’t hot enough. I started worrying about what he thought of me, and if I was too boring.

I realized that when I’m with someone, I focus on trying to be exciting, thinking more about what my partner might want rather than putting my needs and desires first. My question is, how can I focus more on myself and what I like without being selfish in bed?

Jess, 31  Continue Reading

lets-have-sexWith all the complications that come with sex and dating, once you’ve locked someone down, the easiest part should be having sex…right? No longer do you have to impress this person or bring them to a state of awe because you’ve already got them right there on the couch eating potato chips and sloppy joes.

When it comes to actually doing ‘it,’ things become lopsided; one person initiates all the time, and it never seems to cross the other’s mind. Maybe both partners grew into laziness as time passed and before they realized it—the last time they had sex was before football season.  Continue Reading

Pat yourselves on the backs, lovers; so many of you are kicking your bad habits to the curb and making better choices for a better sex life! On today’s Quickie, Emily shares even more of the Spring Cleaning responses she loved so much, and (drum roll, please!) reveals the contest winner! Who’s adding a Magic Wand to their sex toy collection? Find out!

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Ahh, soulmates. Wouldn’t it be nice if finding “the one” was as magical as rom-coms and fairy tales make it out to be? Although Cinderella and Prince Charming supposedly lived happily ever after, their sex life was probably one thing they had to work on like any normal couple—without the help of Cinderella’s fairy godmother.

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Q. 

ezgif.com-resizeHey Emily,

I recently got out of a long-term relationship and jumped into dating—literally! Now I’m seeing three different people, something I’ve never done before, and need some advice on how to handle it.

Is there supposed to be a waiting period in between partners? Can I have sex with two different people in a week (with protection, of course)? If we use my sex toys, can I use them with multiple guys? Also, what’s the etiquette for telling a person I’m not monogamous in a way that won’t hurt them? I just want to be single and date around for a while, but it’s all so complicated!

Any advice would be appreciated,
Jenn

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giphy (19)Greatest bedroom hits: We’ve all got em’. They’re those moves you’ve got down to a science; the ones you learned early in your sexual career and have perfected over time.

Once you settle into a long term relationship, sex becomes a whole compilation of “go-to” moves. You know what spots to hit and where to hit them, you’ve got your positions down pat. It makes sex easy—effortless, actually! 

But the longer you’re with your partner, the more likely you are to end up lodged in an unintended sexual stalemate. The idea of revamping your sex life can be a little overwhelming, depending on just how stuck in a rut you and your partner are.

When it comes to giving your sex life a spring cleaning, don’t feel like you have to become a completely different person in the bedroom; remember they’re with you for a reason! There’s comfort in the familiar. But just because it ain’t broke doesn’t mean it couldn’t be tweaked a little bit here and there, in order to become even better.

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couplesadQ:

Dear Emily,

Thanks for the sexual empowerment you offer to everyone. I have a question about introducing bondage and rough play with a new partner. How do you do it? I actually scared a guy recently when I asked him to choke me in bed. That is obviously not my future goal, so I’m hoping you can help me figure out a way to ease partners into it. Also, what’s the best way to tie someone up?

Thanks again for the great advice! I love your podcast.
Kelsey Continue Reading

f6621dc0467f97bbc75bfb27af4fd4c5Couples everywhere have been haunted by images of what the traditional, monogamous relationship should look like. You know, boy meets girl, they fall in love, stay together forever and have babies; The End.

While this idea reflects the majority of relationships out there, it isn’t the only option. An alternative, known as an open relationship, has existed alongside monogamous relationships for quite some time now. Continue Reading

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