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relationship advice

Q: DEAR EMILY,

I just got out of a relationship with a guy that had a lot of ups and downs. In the beginning we were inseparable, and it totally felt like we were falling in love. Then, about a month in, he went cold fish. He only returned my calls every couple of days and kind of started ghosting me. Then all of a sudden, he invited me to go out of town with him, and we had this amazing long weekend with great sex and I was feeling connected again. Then when we got back, I didn’t hear from him for a week.

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If Emily had her way, there would be a bottle of lube on every night stand all across the world. From flavored, to warming to all-natural ingredients, there’s a lube out there for everyone to enjoy! On today’s show, Emily is joined by her trusty team and an honorary member from System JO, Brie, to talk about all things lube, pubes and so much more!

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We here at Sex With Emily are noticing a trend: you love to talk about threesomes and swinging! We fully support an adventurous sex life, but there are some dos and don’ts to the ins and outs of bringing a stranger into the mix. On today’s show, Emily is joined by show-favorite, Menace, and the two are setting the record straight on all things sex, dating, and masturbation by answering your emails and taking your calls!

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There are things that everyone does—like grocery shopping, sleeping, working—that are subjects we can share about, those mundane yet anecdotal experiences that are relatable. We commiserate on life with one another and it somehow makes it all less boring or lonely. But there are other things that we all do, too—crying, dealing with death, feeling insecure—that are just harder to talk about. Masturbation falls into that latter category.

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From day one as an only child, it was all about ME: my toys, my clothes, my world and ultimately my body. When puberty hit, it became all about ME time; a contemplation and reflection space with a piece of equipment that I suddenly understood after discovering a missing chapter in its user’s manual. An interlude to explore and indulge in any and every twist and turn of a sexual fantasy world that was vertically and horizontally expanding faster than West LA. Yes, there was a little shame in the 15 seconds after planting my flag at the summit, but by and large I felt entitled to this pursuit in the same way many feel about firearms and pedestrian right-of-ways. “I’m doing this and it’s gonna get done. Try and stop me.” Continue Reading

Q: DEAR EMILY,

My boyfriend and I broke up about six months ago, but we’re still living together (we don’t want the expense of breaking our lease, and where we live is very seasonal so it’s hard to find new tenants). He ended things because he was going through some personal stuff and wanted to work on himself. The problem is that we never stopped having sex.

Things started up again casually, where it was just hot and random, but I’ve noticed that lately he has started to bring some feelings back into it and I am finding that I too still have feelings for him. He is very intimate, cupping my face, telling me that he loves me. Then going out with friends and acting single. He’s very back and forth about it. I’m totally confused.

I don’t know if this is normal, or maybe he still wants to be with me? Is it possible to have a “friend with benefits” with an ex?

Brittany, 24,
New Jersey  Continue Reading

Having the courage to ask questions shows that you care about improving your life; whether it’s your love or sex life, you’ve identified something that just isn’t going right, and you want it to be better. On today’s show, Emily is answering all of your quandaries to help give you the knowledge you need for a life full of loving—both in and out of the bedroom.

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When it comes to sex and dating, it can be hard to tell where you’ve gone wrong. You may think you’re speaking the language of love, but are you speaking the right one? On today’s show, Emily is giving her expert advice on common sex and dating dilemmas to get you headed in the right direction for great sex!

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Is Knowing What You Want Sexy or SelfishQ: DEAR EMILY,

I was dating a guy who was great in bed. The first time we hooked up, he asked me what my fantasy was—I told him, we went with it and it was really hot. As we continued to date, he kept asking me what my fantasies were, so then I thought that the ones I had already shared weren’t hot enough. I started worrying about what he thought of me, and if I was too boring.

I realized that when I’m with someone, I focus on trying to be exciting, thinking more about what my partner might want rather than putting my needs and desires first. My question is, how can I focus more on myself and what I like without being selfish in bed?

Jess, 31  Continue Reading

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