Man kissing woman on ChristmasThe holidays are upon us! No matter what celebrations you’re planning, gift-giving is a must. For many of us, it can be difficult to decide what you want to get for that special someone. Luckily, we have some ideas for how you can curate the best gift based on love language. 

Note: Many people value more than one love language so feel free to mix and match as you are shopping this holiday season. 

Words of Affirmation

Individuals who value words of affirmation love to hear frequent compliments and other forms of positive, supportive commentary from their loved ones. 

Gift Ideas

People who feel most loved from receiving words of affirmation love compliments. Turn this into a gift by making a compliment jar! Simply write down all of your favorite things about the person, or maybe favorite memories or motivational sayings that they can read throughout the year. Alternatively, you can create a scrapbook with all of your favorite memories and moments with your loved one.

If you’re more drawn to music, a carefully curated playlist could be an easy way to show a person who values words of affirmation just how much they mean to you. Remember: a thoughtful note or card is a must-have for individuals who value words of affirmation. Another great way to use words to show your love is audio erotica. Whereas porn is more visually stimulating, audio erotica caters to audio stimulation, using words to describe sexy scenarios. Consider getting your partner a subscription to &Jane, an app with a wide array of authentic audio erotica, so they can get even more pleasure for what they hear.

Gifts

Those who value gifts feel loved when they are able to interact with visual symbols of love. It is important to note that those with this love language are not specifically interested in the monetary value of these gifts—rather, they appreciate the time and care that went into the giving.

Gift Ideas 

If your partner uses gifts to show love, why not show them the gift of pleasure? Toys can make great gifts. Whether it’s the Womanizer, Zumio, or We-Vibe, toys truly are the gift that keeps on giving.

If you’re looking for a non-sexual gift, pay close attention to any subtle hints or mentions your partner has made. Individuals with this love language will really appreciate the effort taken to pay attention and find the perfect gift for them.

If you are overwhelmed with the possibilities and not sure what route to take, think of your partner’s favorite things, or gifts they’ve liked in the past. Maybe they love a certain Etsy shop or type of jewelry. Maybe they’re all about cozy things, like candles or blankets.  In any case, you know your partner best of all—so think carefully about their personality and what would best resonate with them.

Acts of Service

Those who value acts of service as their love language appreciate when their loved one spends time to make their life a little easier. These acts can be anything from a simple household chore to filling the car with gas to babysitting. 

Gift Ideas

Individuals with this love language will appreciate any thoughtful gift, especially if it took time and effort for you to create it. You might consider completing a larger chore or project for them, making them breakfast in bed, or baking their favorite dessert.

Another great option is a coupon book. Compile a list of tasks you will complete for and with your partner. They can be anything from cleaning up around the house, date ideas, and sexual favors (obviously). 

Quality Time   

People who value quality time feel the most appreciated when their loved one prioritizes activities and one-on-one time. Quality time isn’t just time spent hanging out, but rather truly connecting with one another through activities and hobbies without extraneous distractions.

Gift Ideas

Show your partner you care by giving a gift that you can share together. It can be an intricately planned date night at home, a picnic in the park, or a weekend away at a nice hotel or AirbnbIf you want to plan something intricate, try giving a series of dates for the next year. Use envelopes to seal different gift and date ideas to be opened by the month or date written on the outside of the envelope. These can be anything that you think your partner will enjoy like spa gift cards, details for a hike you can do in May, an ice cream date in July, or plans to go ice skating in January.

Another great way to share quality time is by completing our Yes, No, Maybe List–a comprehensive and inspiring list of different sexual experiences. By checking things off this list, you can determine together what are things you like or would like to do together and discuss them.

Physical Touch

Valuing physical touch as a love language means appreciating and feeling affirmed through a physical connection, whether that’s kissing, cuddling, holding hands, or sex. Gifts for a person who values physical touch don’t necessarily need to be physical (though that can be awesome), but also gateways into a physical experience. 

Gift Ideas

A massage (or a coupon book of massages paired with sexual favors) can be a great option for those who value physical touch. Consider also gifting them with Exsens warming oil to create a warm, scented, and intimate experience. Other ways to give the gift of touch is by providing tools for sensual experiences, like a bath bomb, body lotion, or high-power toy, like the Magic Wand

Regardless of one’s love language, the holiday season is a great time to show your loved ones just how much you care and appreciate them. Gift-giving can be stressful, but by tapping into that special someone’s love language of choice, you can find something that truly represents how you feel. Happy holidays!

Ovie Crum is a UCLA graduate originally from the bay area. She joined the Sex with Emily family in June of 2019, loves spending time outdoors, and aspires to one day own a dog of her own.

Do Not Disturb SignIn a perfect world, we would all be able to have sex whenever the mood strikes, free of inhibition, obstacle, or obstruction. We would do it in the kitchen in the middle of the day, maybe in the living room at dusk. But for many of us, privacy is a luxury that we don’t quite have in our homes. Whether it be roommates, neighbors, kids, or other family members, plenty of sexually active adults live with other people. 

So what do you do when you’re horny in a full house? How can you scratch your sexual itch when you don’t have the comfort of solitude? Fear not. There is hope for ye horny folk, yet. Here are some ways you can have sex in a full house while staying secretive. 

Get steamy in the shower.

It might not be the most spacious setting, but bathrooms are the pinnacle of privacy when you’re living with others. You don’t have to worry about anyone bothering you or barging in as long as the shower is running and the door is locked. If you’re single, bring a water-safe toy with you and get a little dirty before you wash yourself clean. If you’re looking to have sex with a partner, the noise of the shower will likely drown out the sound—just go in and exit at separate times so no one knows what you’ve been up to. 

Plus, shower sex lends itself to certain positions that you might skip over while getting it on elsewhere. Just remember to keep soap away from open orifices and that water does not double as lube. 

Be an early riser. 

If you’re into morning sex, set your alarm a bit earlier than you normally would. Wipe the sleep from your eyes, roll over, and get it in first thing in the morning. If you’re up before the sun, chances are you’ll be up before anyone else in the house too—just make sure your alarm isn’t so alarming that it would wake people in other rooms. (And remember not to hit the snooze so you don’t miss out on sexy time.)

Not a morning person? You can do the reverse and stay up long past everyone else’s bedtime. Either way, you’ll be having O’s while everyone else is catching Z’s. 

Have sex off the bed. 

Bed frames and box springs tell no lies when it comes to sex. That unmistakable sound of two bodies bouncing together in bed seems to permeate even the thickest walls and announce your love-making to the masses. But you can avoid the dreaded “creak creak creak” by doing your business on the floor!  Throw down some pillows for comfort, blankets for warmth, and sheets to protect you from rug burn, then bang it out on the ground.

You’ll be surprised at how much harder you can go when you don’t have to worry about the sturdiness of the structure you’re rocking on. You may have to muffle your moans with the pillows and keep the spanking to a minimum, but sometimes restrictions make sex all the more fun.

Be shameless.

Depending on the age of your housemates, consider being honest and upfront about your plans to get it on. You can relieve yourself of the worry of getting caught by putting it all out there in the first place. It might involve a touch of scheduling, but you would be surprised at how understanding people can be. Maybe your roommate can take a walk in the afternoon and leave the house available for your erotic romps. Maybe telling them will unlock a new level of bonding and respect that you didn’t suspect you could achieve.

Of course, be mindful of the nature of your relationships and do your best not to make others uncomfortable. But if we all start normalizing sex, the world would be a better and more pleasurable place. 

Cohabitation is complicated, especially when it comes to sex. But where there’s a will, there’s a way to home base. With some planning, creativity, and a little communication, all your wildest sex dreams can come true, even if you’re living in a full house.

Laurie Magers is a comedy writer and actor living in Los Angeles. Her favorite color is red and her favorite food is crab legs. Check out more from her at www.lauriemagers.com.

Real talk: 2020 was hard for everyone. If you’re anything like us, you’re determined to make the last month of the year special—and what better way to do that than giving the gift of pleasure? Whether you’re buying something for you, your partner, or your mom, the Sex With Emily Gift Guide is here to help.

To make it easier, we’ve divided things up into five sections: Gifts for Singles, Gifts for Couples, Sexual Self-Care, Stocking Stuffers, and Everything Lifestyle. Happy Shopping!

Gifts for Singles

Lily Allen Womanizer Premium

Lily Allen Liberty by Womanizer 

Using pulses of air to deliver indirect clitoral stimulation, The Liberty is Womanizer’s most compact model. Not only does it feel like the most amazing oral sex you could imagine, but it’s also been released in a new version designed by singer Lily Allen–because, like most vulva owners who experience Womanizer’s Pleasure Air Technology, she’s obsessed with it too. 

b-vibe Anal Training and Education Set

Hot tip–anal play is for everyone. If you’ve got a butt, show it some love. If you’re new to things, or just want to learn to do it right, this set from b-vibe is for you. It includes 3 different sized plugs, a lube applicator, and more! They even give you a comprehensive, expert-written step-by-step guide. 

Magic Wand Plus

Quite simply, the most iconic name in sex toys! Magic Wand has been delivering pleasure since 1968 – before we went to the moon! Cosmo calls it ‘the Little Black Dress’ of vibrators and Time Magazine chose it as one of the century’s most influential gadgets. The Magic Wand Plus features the plug-in power of the Original, variable speeds, and a soft silicone head. 

Sex With Emily Je Joue Mimi

Don’t be fooled by the Mimi’s unassuming looks. this “just right” vibe has been one of Emily’s favs for years. Just right size, just the right power, and just the right price.

Max 2 Masturbator with Bluetooth by Lovense

If you’re a penis owner, or you’re simply shopping for one, the Max 2 Masturbator is a great way to amp up the self-pleasure game. It works as both an air pump and a vibrator, with three modes that be controlled on the underside or your smartphone. Because the air pump is designed to mimic vaginal spasms, this toy is one that is sure to send you over the edge and riding the waves of ecstasy.

Hot Octopuss Pulse SoloOctopuss Sex Toy

Truly one of the more revolutionary products for the penis, the Pulse Solo is an open-ended sleeve that uses an oscillating pad to stimulate the frenulum. What’s the frenulum, you ask? Well, my penis having friends, it’s the super-sensitive spot just below the head. It works so well, a lot of folks enjoy it hands-free.

Gifts for Couples

We-Vibe Melt

The Melt is the first We-Vibe to use Pleasure Air Technology specifically designed for couple’s play. It’s perfectly contoured to let it nestle in place over the clitoris during penetration. The result is a mind-blowing combo of air pulses and an intimate connection with your partner, no matter who’s holding it.

Sportsheets Bed Bondage Restraint KitWoman Laying on the Bed Sportsheets

Whether you’re into restraint play or think you might want to give it a try, this kit is an awesome add on to any bed. It’s a one-piece system that slips under your mattress. When you’re ready for fun, simply pull out the soft, velcro cuffs and slap them on: hands, feet, all four, whatever you want. When you’re done, just tuck it all away for next time.

Pleasure for All by Playboy

One of the most revered names in intimacy, Playboy introduces an all-new line of CBD-infused couple’s products. Start the evening out in the tub with their Bath Bomb, then move into the bedroom to try the clitoral arousal spray and intimacy gel. All products feature premium quality ingredients and organically grown hemp oil. 

Massage Oil Candle Lotus No. 9

Candles in general are great to set the mood and add calming, sensual scents to the bedroom. Massage candles, however, have the added bonus of being able to try temperature play and to pamper your partner (or yourself!) with a sensual massage. Not all candles work for this since they have a higher temperature to melt, but Kiki de Montparnasse’s Massage Oil Candles melts at just above body temperature, so it will be warm to the touch without the risk of burning the skin. It’s a discreet way to deepen your and your partner’s intimacy.

Adventure Challenge for Couples

Who doesn’t love a challenge? Take your relationship to the next level with an Adventure Challenge book to share amazing experiences with your partner. This guide contains 50 challenges with a cost range of $0 to $50, and you won’t know what the activity is until you scratch it off. It’s a fun way to add spontaneity to your relationship, while also creating and documenting beautiful memories together. 

Sexual Self Care

Exsens Intimate Care Collection

It’s time to give yourself permission to slow down and enjoy some intimate pampering. But pro tip–start with healthy products. We’re all loving the Intimate Care Collection from Exsens. Their Intime Balance is an intimate cleansing gel; Intime Fresh foaming is an intimate cleanser; and Intime is Cocoa Shea body oil. They’re all from France, and they’re all amazing.

Tabu Menopause Pleasure Kit Tabu Sexual Wellness for Menopause

Newsflash: pleasure is our birthright, no matter how old you are–or feel! Tabu was introduced just for vulva owners who may no longer be enjoying intimacy due to changes in their bodies. It’s a wonderful kit that includes a specifically-designed, slim, and ergonomic vibrator with a warming head and intuitive controls, as well as a specially formulated lube. The combo makes the perfect gift for anyone who needs a reintroduction to intimacy and pleasure–whether that’s you or a loved one.

Yarlap

Even if you’re a Kegel expert, doing these exercises regularly–and effectively–can be challenging. Enter Yarlap, a discreet, FDA-Cleared device you use at home to strengthen your pelvic floor automatically. Their exclusive AutoKegel technology delivers precision stimulation to your PC muscle. The result? Kegels of steel, no more sneezing-and-peeing, and even stronger orgasms.

Ohnut

Let’s be real, sex can be painful for a lot of vulva owners. This was true for Ohnut’s inventor, so she set out to design a solution that allowed her to enjoy intimacy again. Ohnut is a soft, stackable ring that fits around the penis to create a cushioned bumper that limits the depth of penetration. The result is an intimate connection for both partners without the pain. 

Lorals Latex PantiesLorals Latex Panties

Introducing a new way to say yes to oral! Let’s face it, vulva owners have plenty of legit reasons to avoid receiving oral, whether it’s their period, just getting home from the gym, or plain old modesty. But none of those should stop you from enjoying pleasure, and Lorals lets you do just that. These silky, stretchy latex panties replace the outdated dental dam, making them perfect for feeling all the sensations oral sex has to offer.

The Intimacy Deck 

The perfect addition to date night: 150 prompts to spark deeper and more meaningful conversations. This game is great for couples who have been together for years or the ones who are looking to get to know one another. In every case, the Date Night Game encourages couples to spend quality time together and spice things up. Describe your first kiss, learn each other’s love languages, and find deeper seeds of connection. 

Sex Journal

Sex is fun to have, but not always easy to talk about. This shared journal makes it easier for couples to reflect and connect with communication tips, intentional setting exercises, and thoughtful writing prompts, leading to more open and honest conversations—and some pretty awesome sex. 

Stocking Stuffers

Emily’s Vesper Necklace

Is that a vibrator around your neck? Why yes, yes it is. Perhaps one of the greatest conversation pieces ever, Emily’s Vesper vibrating necklace is the perfect gift for anyone who wants to put their dedication to pleasure on display. Oh yeah, it doesn’t just look beautiful, it’s a pretty amazing little vibe, too!

&Jane Audio Erotica

Looking for erotica that literally speaks to you? Try &Jane. You can listen to audio erotica created authentically by women storytellers. Follow your favorites every week–or even submit your own anonymous sexy stories. It’s 100% inclusive and ethical, and totally hot! 

Muse Flavored Lubes

Hot Tip: flavored lube will change your oral sex game forever. Not only do Muse flavors taste incredible for the giver, but they also make oral feel amazing for the receiver. Trust–there’s no substitute for genuine enthusiasm, and when your partner tastes like Crème Brûlée or Salted Caramel, all bets are off!

Promescent Delay Spray + Arousal Gel

What started as one doctor’s mission to help those struggling with premature ejaculation, Promescent’s flagship delay spray is clinically proven to help men last up to 64% longer. Combine that with their unreal clitoral arousal gel and you’re well on your way to closing that orgasm gap for good.

ScreamingO My Secret Cosmetic-Look ToysScreaming-O Cosmetic

Imagine a lipstick vibe that actually looks like a lipstick… or mascara… or lip balm… What you see is not what you get with these super fun look-a-likes. These cute and cleverly disguised sex toys feel great and fool everyone else!

Just Dessert Chocolate Body Paint

The holidays are all about indulgence—so why not bring that mindset into the bedroom? Made with quality ingredients and real French chocolate, the Just Dessert Body Paint is the perfect way to end a romantic holiday meal. Honey Pot NecklaceUse a paintbrush (or your finger) to create fun and sexy body art on your partner’s skin.

Honey Pot Uterus Necklace

Slay all day in this gold-plated, statement uterus necklace that celebrates womanhood like never before. This limited-edition gold feminist necklace is handmade by two female designers who hope their uterus jewelry will be worn as a source of inspiration and pride for women everywhere. Get your uterus pendant before it’s gone!

 

Everything Lifestyle

P.volve On Demand, Functional Fitness

Give the gift of better sex and a firmer body! P.volve delivers incredibly effective, on-demand “Functional Fitness” workouts that will get you in shape–from the inside out. This not only includes your core but your pelvic floor, too! Better strength, balance, and orgasms in one workout! 

MasterClass

Ready to really expand your sexual horizons with Emily? Or maybe you want to learn to negotiate. Or cook. Or build a business–whatever you want to learn, you can do it with MasterClass. They offer classes on every topic from the world’s leading experts–including Emily! 

Booda Organics

Everything about Booda Organics is worth celebrating. Their handmade skin products are produced with high quality, food-grade, organic, non-GMO, and vegan ingredients, making them one of the safest additions to your self-care routine. (Plus, they feel amazing.) Products include a daily moisturizer, lip balms, natural deodorant, soap bars, and even laundry detergent. It’s the perfect gift for anyone who needs some pure self-care. 

Else Lingerie 

Else Lingerie is designed to elevate the everyday. Whether it’s worn as a foundation piece or all on its own, their line of beautiful and diverse lingerie, loungewear, and beachwear makes you feel as good as you look. Their brand statement is anchored in celebrating the modern and multi-faced woman, with unique designs ideal for a variety of occasions. Shop by category or use their gift guide to find your perfect fit. 

Tommy John 

We’re obsessed with Tommy John’s underwear, pajamas, and loungewear. The fabric is incredibly breathable, and they design their products to fit the modern body—meaning no riding up or bunching. (Thank god.) They make products for all genders, so it’s a great choice regardless of who you’re shopping for this year. After all, doesn’t everyone love the gift of comfort?

Herbivore Calm KitHerbivore Calm Kit

Let’s be real: 2020 has been anything but easy. Whether you’re looking for the ideal gift for someone who’s had a rough year, or you’re simply looking to destress yourself, the Herbivore Calm Kit from Knack is a great choice. Combining some of the most iconic and soothing skincare treatures from Herbivore Botanicals, these hydrating and calming bath products are suitable for all skin types.

woman with flower over bodyWhenever you hear the word “mapping,” the thoughts that rush to mind are a little less about sexual empowerment, a little more middle school geography class. But what if we were to tell you that this age-old activity could be the very key to unlocking a whole new world of pleasure? Vulva mapping, to be specific. 

Perhaps it sounds a bit strange at first, but rest assured, it won’t for long! Because with the help of a clear head, specific intent, a dash of patience, and sweet, sensual touch, you too can be on your way to uncovering a new sense of your sexiest self. 

If you know, you know. If you don’t…prepare to be amazed. 

What exactly is Vulva Mapping?

Vulva mapping, in a nutshell, is the hands-on practice of learning the “topography” of female-bodied genitals. Through mindful massage and intentional touch, it’s a way for individuals to get to know their bodies better and, as a result, grow more attuned to and comfortable with their own sexuality. 

Seems pretty great, right? Especially in this day and age! But, pausing to remember that female sexuality isn’t something that’s always been the most…celebrated topic, it begs the question of how all of this actually began.

In the late ‘60s and early ‘70s emerged a feminist organization called the New York Radical Women. Dedicated to opposing the deep-rooted patriarchal system, the group sought ways to overturn the notion of a male-dominated society and give women the power to no longer be oppressed. One of which began with the idea of hosting what they called “feminist consciousness-raising” groups. 

The primary goal of these groups was to collectively shine light on issues of the “women’s experience” and figure out how they can most effectively implement their mission out into the rest of the world. One such method was the vaginal self-examination, where each member grabbed a mirror and flashlight to study their own lady bits in a group setting. 

Instead of hiding in the typical throes of embarrassment or self-consciousness, this activity thrust women into looking at themselves in ways they had likely never done before. In addition to now knowing what was actually down there, they could finally take charge of their female differences, have more confidence in their own skin, and bust through long-held taboos surrounding their sexualities—and furthermore, their place in society. 

So from there, vulva mapping was born! And the good news is it’s something that’s only gotten better with age. 

Benefits of Vulva Mapping

Now that we’ve covered the historical roots, I’m sure you’re curious to know more about the lovely perks it can actually yield. 

Whether it’s a result of our upbringing, peers, social media or trauma, there are so many feelings of embarrassment and/or shame prone to building up within our bodies over the years. In return, those feelings can cause heightened levels of stress, anxiety, self-consciousness and other subconscious pressures that impact how we perceive our sexual selves. 

That said, learning to better understand and feel more confident in our own skin is one of the most effective ways to counteract those negative effects. Hence, vulva mapping enters the picture here as a great tool to help kick-start that journey. 

Seeing what the vulva actually looks like, getting to know how every part individually feels, learning all of the different sensations you’re capable of feeling and realizing what your body likes best—each step of the process can lead to an overall boost in everything from confidence and sexual satisfaction, to one’s trust and sense of connection with others down the line.

Who is it for?

In the wise words of Diane von Furstenberg: “The most important relationship in your life is the relationship you have with yourself.” Which rings especially true for emphasizing who’s the main beneficiary of vulva mapping—you! 

But as with many things in the world of sex, the biggest perks of the practice can absolutely carry over to one’s bond with their partner as well. By knowing what you like and how you like it, being more comfortable with talking about sex and fostering even deeper feelings of mutual closeness and understanding, it’s a no-brainer that this personal growth from vulva mapping can bring major strengths to any relationship.

How To Explore It

For anyone interested in exploring vulva mapping for themselves, it’s time to finally find out exactly how.

First off, keep in mind that intention is everything. Because this is a “mindful” practice, it’s important to immerse yourself in the process, as opposed to treating it like just another task on the to-do list. Setting an intention (which can change along the way) of what you most want to get out of experience can help focus your energy and keep yourself truly present in the moment.

Next up: the tools. Whether you’re being intimate with a partner or by yourself, mood is everything. So set yourself up for success by ensuring your environment is comfortable and relaxing—no matter if it’s your bedroom, bathroom, or hey, even your fluffy couch. Once you have that down, grab a mirror, some lube and perhaps a little companion like the Zumio that can help mix up the stimulation. Zumio happens to be a great option due to its tiny tip and pressure-sensitive intensity. 

Take deep breaths, relax your body, get in a comfortable position and take a good look at what’s down there. If you have trouble staying wet, consider a lube, like pjur lubricants. Lube can also increase sensation, making the exploration all the more fun. If you want to have your partner explore with you, consider a massage leading up to get, as this helps ignite your senses and relax the muscles. Don’t skimp on the massage oil—Exsens makes our favorites. 

We all remember those health class diagrams, but seeing every part of your own vulva puts it into perspective. Distinguish between the mons pubis, the inner and outer labia and different parts of the clitoris, up through the vaginal opening, fourchette, perineum and finally the anus. There’s probably a lot more down there than you ever realized, so now, it’s time to get a feel for it. Literally!

Remember, stay relaxed, don’t hold your breath and, after slathering your fingers with lube or oil, start gently massaging yourself all over. Begin with your breasts, stomach and thighs, then ease your way down to the genital area. Slowly, softly stroke along the entire area, paying attention to all of the different parts. Meanwhile, keep your mirror at bay to watch how each section changes in appearance as you slowly get more aroused. 

Paying close attention to how your body reacts to individual stimulation of each area, you can gauge when you’re ready for more. Whether it’s more intense rubbing with your fingers or using a Zumio to really pinpoint your pleasure zones, continue experimenting with varying degrees of intensity throughout distinct parts of the vulva. If you run across any discomfort or extreme sensitivity, slowly work your way through it, lightly massaging the area and making sure to keep breathing.

While you’re at it, consider exploring other parts of your genitals for a truly well-rounded sexual experience. Kegels, or exercises for your PC muscles, can help strengthen and elongate your orgasms. Yarlap is a tool that actually does your kegels for you, and can be a great way for someone who needs a little reminder to exercise.

In the end, you want your body to feel at ease, embrace the sensual vibes, feel totally empowered and continuously comforted. It might end in orgasm, but that’s certainly not the main goal. By taking a tantalizing tour from top to bottom, the idea is to become hyperaware of what sensations your body is able to experience and unlock the pleasure potential that lies within.

And lastly, remember…

It’s about the journey, not the destination. And even though you’ve probably gotten your fix of cliché quotes by now, it’s an important one to keep in mind because vulva mapping is far from a one-and-done situation.

Think about the world of pleasure as a revolving door of possibility, and with that, practices like vulva mapping as ways to continue growing and learning new things about ourselves. Each time you do it, you’re even more equipped and evolved than the time before, so why not take the plunge to prioritize your pleasure and see where the voyage takes you?

This is the year of self-care, after all, so definitely consider adding vulva mapping to your rotation.

Alex Anderson is an LA-based lifestyle designer proactively raging against the cultural grain. By day she works in television production, and by night enjoys writing, sewing and seeking guidance from the stars. She also finally has an all black kitty named “Cher.” You can follow her alt-lifestyle blog MSFT Living and on Instagram!

woman lying in bed topless, covering her chest, with gift boxes next to her.

It’s our favorite time of year! All of the sex toys are going on sale and we can shop our favorite brands at a steal of a price. Whether you’re shopping for your partner, friend, or simply yourself, these Black Friday sex toy deals are guaranteed to heat up the holidays. 

And don’t worry if you or your loved one is a sex toy newbie. All of the brands on this list offer sex toys and accessories that are perfect for everyone, from novice to sexpert. And besides, what better way to show someone you love them than with the gift of pleasure? Ahead, you’ll find some of the best sex toy deals totally worth scoring.

Promescent

What started as a doctor’s mission to help men who struggled with premature ejaculation, Promescent has evolved into a collection of sexual wellness products designed to enhance every intimate experience. Their flagship product is a clinically proven delay spray for him, which helps men last up to 64% longer. They also have an arousal gel for her that further closes the orgasm gap, and so much more. Promescent is leading the way to more fulfilling sex.

Save 20% on orders of $50 or more with code BF2020.

We-Vibe Toys

We-Vibe, the creators of the entire Couple’s Toy category, now provides some of the industry’s most popular products of the highest quality products. So much more than “toys,” We-Vibe’s research and development keeps pushing the envelope of pleasure and technology.

Save 20% sitewide—no code necessary.

Womanizer 

Three words: Pleasure. Air. Technology. Those incredible pulses of air that indirectly stimulate the clitoris and deliver mind-blowing orgasms—that’s what Womanizer is all about. Emily has even dubbed it the “Orgasm Whisperer.” Every Womanizer product features these patented pulses, making them one of the most unique sex products on the market.

Save 20% sitewide—no code necessary.

pjur lubricants

Direct to you from Germany, pjur lubricants (pronounced “pure”) feature only the highest quality ingredients and are available in formulations for every occasion. Remember: using lube can actually increase the chance of your orgasm, whether you’re using it with sex toys or your partner. If you’re looking to start dipping your toes into the lube pool, consider pjur.

Save 20% sitewide—no code necessary.

Good Vibrations Toys and Accessories 

The origin of Emily’s first vibrator is now the most trusted source for quality pleasure products. Good Vibrations has everything from toys to games to lubes, and it’s all been tested and proven to make sure you’re getting the best. 

Save 20% sitewide—no code necessary.

Magic Wand 

One of the most iconic names in sex toys is now one of the hottest sex toy deals. The Magic Wand has been delivering pleasure since 1968—yep, before we even went to the Moon. Cosmo calls it “the Little Black Dress” of vibrators, Time magazine chose it as one of the century’s most influential gadgets, and New York Time‘s Wirecutter named the Magic Wand Rechargeable as Vibrator of the Year for 2020. In other words, you can’t go wrong.

Save 20% sitewide—no code necessary.

Zumio 

Are you ready for something mind-blowing? Try Zumio. Its precision tip and totally unique motion are built for exploration, with rotation and NOT vibration–a totally unique experience. That’s right, it’s not a vibrator, but it will give you some pretty intense orgasms. And, to ensure you’re getting the most of your experience, they just released a 25-page companion guide called “Mapping Your Pleasure: Zumio’s Guide to Vulva Exploration.” Trust us, this will change your self-discovery practices. 

Save 20% on any model and get the guide for free with your purchase—no code necessary.

P.volve

Give yourself the gift of better sex and a firmer body. P.volve offers on-demand workouts that use “Functional Fitness” to get you in shape, which basically means it’s working your body from the inside out. This not only includes your core but your pelvic floor, as well. And if we know anything about a stronger pelvic floor, it’s that it can lead to better orgasms.

Save 50% off equipment kits and memberships through Sunday with code BF50, then 30% off sitewide the week after with code CW30.

MasterClass

Ready to dive deep into your sexual wellness with Emily? Or maybe you want to learn to cook. Or negotiate. Or play basketball. Whatever you want to learn, you can do it with MasterClass. They have classes on every topic from the world’s leading experts—including Emily. Right now, you can buy one membership and get one free for a friend. Happy holidays!

BOGO Membership 

Yarlap 

Even if you’re a Kegel expert, doing these exercises regularly and effectively can be challenging. Enter Yarlap, a discreet, FDA-cleared device you use at home to strengthen your pelvic floor automatically. Their exclusive AutoKegel technology delivers precision stimulation to your PC muscle. The results? Kegels of steel, no more sneeze-and-pee, and even stronger orgasms.

Save $50 with the code FAMILY

New England Low-T Center

Newsflash: Low Testosterone can affect everything from sexual performance and desire to your ability to stay in shape. But it’s normal and certainly nothing to be embarrassed about. The good news: you can do something about it, and New England Low T Center is here to help you. Their medically-controlled and doctor-prescribed treatments can optimize your testosterone levels and put the spring back in your step.

Save 20% on your first order and add a 10% lifetime discount on all their services with code EMILY

Muse 

Pro Tip: flavored lube will change the way you think about oral sex forever. Not only do Muse flavors taste incredible for the giver, but they also make oral feel amazing for the receiver. Trust us, it’s a win-win.

Save 50% with code MUSEBF50

Je Joue 

Je Joue is the name behind a whole host of “Just Right” sex toys. From their awesome Mimi Clitoral Vibe to their Mio Penis Ring, you will find something that is the perfect fit, power, style, and price for you. And with 30% off, it’s one of those sex toy deals where you can check out with something for nearly everyone on your list. 

Save 30% off any product with code EMILY30

&Jane

Looking for erotica that literally speaks to you? Try &Jane. You can listen to audio erotica created authentically by women storytellers. Follow your favorites every week or even submit your own anonymous sexy stories. It’s 100% inclusive, ethical, and totally hot.

No code necessary

Exsens

Exsens brings you some of the most luscious lubes, lotions, and body care items all the way from France. We’re obsessed with pretty much everything they make, from their Warming Massage Oils to their amazing intimate care collection called Intime. These are products you can feel good about using, as they use only the best ingredients—and yet still come with amazing scents and tastes.

Get a FREE GIFT with any purchase over $50.

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