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sex-love-life-2013-12-05-woman-on-laptop-mainDear Emily,

I’ve been in a sexual rut, so I’m looking for some fun ways to get excited about sex again. I’ve heard you suggest erotica as a way to get turned on, but I find the majority of porn to be a huge turn-off (especially the kind my guy watches). Am I missing something here? Or is there porn out there that’s better for me? And if so, how do I find it?

Sincerely,

*Angelica

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Did my favorite sex toy make me unable to orgasm?

This is a question I frequently get asked, mostly from women who frequent one high-powered sex toy and worry about it de-sensitizing their lady parts.

Many of us have been there. We find a toy that we love, that nails it every damn time, and give it the starring role in our solo sex life. But then, over time, the orgasms stop coming, and the worrying begins. Maybe the toy was TOO good at it’s job? Maybe it’s ruined me for all other sex toys? Why has my Magic Wand forsaken me? Continue Reading

How-to-Get-Over-Trust-Issues-in-Your-RelationshipDear Emily,

I’ve been with my partner for 4 years and up until a month ago, I thought we were the perfect couple. Then I found out he cheated on me last year. It was a one-time thing with a woman he used to work with, and he swears that they didn’t keep in touch afterward. He confessed this all to me, and I got the sense that it had really been eating him up inside — for a good reason, clearly.

It goes without saying that I’m completely heartbroken, but I feel even more destroyed at the thought of ending the relationship. I do love him so much, and I know he’ll do anything to re-build my trust… I’m just not sure if love is enough to heal what’s been broken. So my question is, what now? Do I stay with him and try to work it out? Or should I cut my losses and make a clean break? Can a relationship actually survive cheating? And if so… How?

Sincerely,
Betrayed and Confused

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BathSexyDear Emily,

I have a problem with masturbation — I can’t do it.

It’s not that I’m a prude about masturbation. Believe me, I have tried time and time again! I know what I’m supposed to do and I get how to do it, I’ve masturbated in front of a partner before and it was GREAT. But when it’s me by myself, I just can’t seem to get into it or even get to a place where it feels good. Since I’m doing the actual touching part the right way, I know it has to be something about my mindset. What am I doing wrong?

How can I help myself get in the mood for masturbation?

Sincerely,
Solo Sex Struggles

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blow partnerDear Emily,

I LOVE pleasing my man, but I’ve found it really hard to make him orgasm when I give him any form of oral. I wouldn’t say I’m an expert or anything, but I have honestly never had this problem before. I’ve asked him what I can do to improve but I think he’s even more inexperienced than I am. I really want to surprise him with the best oral of his life! How can I give him a blow job that will blow his mind? Continue Reading

article-2291280-188E2ECB000005DC-807_634x800“Dear Emily,

I recently started dating a guy (a great guy, actually!) and things are going really well. There’s only one problem… I’m afraid to have sex with him! We’ve been seeing each other for almost two months now and we still haven’t done the deed. It’s not that I’m not attracted to him or that I’m afraid he won’t respect me. The real reason is that I am pretty sure I’m bad in bed.

I’ve only been with two guys, and neither seemed to be that into the sex. One of them looked downright bored! I like this new guy a lot and would really like to wow him in the sack, but now I’m extremely self-conscious. What if we have sex and it’s terrible and he doesn’t want to date me anymore? I need help! How do I know if I’m terrible at sex? And more importantly, how can I fix it?

Sincerely,
BIB, 24

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“Dear Emily,

I’m not with a partner at the moment but I masturbate regularly. I know how to make myself have an orgasm and after I do, I feel satisfied, but I want to go again. Trouble is, I have to take a break for about ten minutes because otherwise it will take me a very long time to orgasm again and I usually give up before then. I’ve always wanted to be able to have multiple orgasms (within a minute or two of each other) but I’ve never been able to. My question is, is there any way to train yourself to have multiple orgasms?”

Love,

Anna

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bed-couple-love-sex-sexy-Favim.com-188678_large-79Q:
Hi Emily,

I have a question regarding sex with my fiancé. We really only have sex on the weekends, maybe once or twice on Saturday or on Sunday morning. He works long hours and is often very tired after work, and he has stated on multiple occasions that he doesn’t feel like having sex when he is tired. Personally, I would love to be getting busy more often, but I always end up feeling like he’s just not into it.

Recently I brought up these feelings to him and he admitted that he is often too tired to initiate sex, but he wouldn’t turn me down if I got things started. He has always been the initiator in our relationship, so I know it’s my turn to make the first move, but I’m having trouble getting things started. How can I get better at initiating sex?

Thanks,
Sarah


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Screen Shot 2015-11-12 at 11.59.12 AMHi Emily,

I have a concern about something that has been happening when my boyfriend and I have sex. When we are having a longer sex session (past 30 minutes) I’ve noticed that I tend to dry out, even though I was extremely wet a few minutes before. And what’s worse, it becomes extremely uncomfortable. Is it possible that I could run out of my own juices? I mean, I’m only 22! This has really been affecting my sex life, because I take a longer time to orgasm during intercourse, and my boyfriend usually takes a while also. Is this normal? What should I do?

 

Thanks,

Kate

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23ee19a9b887f4ee7af229e2977f6619Q: Dear Emily,

Thanks to you, I am now a woman with several sex toys. I have recently fallen in love with my Magic Wand vibrator, and it has totally changed things for me in that I can now not only orgasm, but have multiple orgasms! But now I’m wondering.. Is it bad that I only ever want to use my vibrator to masturbate? The things is, I’ve heard rumors about vibrators actually desensitizing the clitoris, and now I’m worried that I’m ruining my vagina! Is this true? Whenever I go back to using my hands, it takes SO long to get there and I’m not even sure if I’m climaxing. Has it already started? Am I addicted to my vibrator? Help!

Sincerely,
Vibrator Obsessed, 22

 

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