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sexual independence blog sex with emilySexual independence is all about taking control of your own pleasure. There may be other people involved in the process, but when it comes down to it, your pleasure is your prerogative. 

You may expect your partner to pick you up from the airport. You probably expect them to remember your birthday and to fix the shower curtain that they broke. Yet, I’m sorry to tell you, you can’t expect your partner to be responsible for your orgasms.

In movies and TV, sex usually looks like three or four thrusts followed by simultaneously orgasming. Of course, anyone that’s ever had sex knows that it usually takes a little bit more than that to really get sent over the edge. And while you may want your partner to whisk you away and do what they will with you, the truth is, when it comes to your orgasms, you’re the one in charge. Here’s how to take control of your own pleasure.

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play blog sex with emilyWith some states coming out of Covid-19 lockdown, many people are venturing out, having BBQs, trying to responsibly socialize and might feel like they have been let out of jail of social “confinement.” During the past few months of quarantine time (and especially since May was Masturbation Month), a lot of people have been focusing on masturbation as sexual release. Yay! But don’t let up on this focus just because you are potentially unleashed into the world and able to start to touch others.

This month is Pride month, and this year, our focus here at Sex With Emily during Pride is “playfulness.” In the theme of playfulness, finding new ways to play with your body is one of the best ways to spend Pride month!

Here are some ways you can “play” with your body.

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masturbation mindset blog sex with emilyHave you ever flicked the bean or polished the pole but barely limped to the finish line, or even quit the race halfway through? The truth is, not all masturbation is created equal. Luckily, the key to successful self-pleasure is totally in your hands. It all starts with getting into the right mindset.

Masturbation is as much a mental game as it is a physical one. So as we come to the close of Masturbation May, here are some tips to get your head in the right space for self-pleasure.

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sex toys men blog sex with emilyMost people think that sex toys are just for women, but that is not the case! In fact, they can be an amazing addition to any man’s sexual arsenal. Whether you’re going solo or with a partner, toys can deepen your pleasure, increase your erection time, boost sexual satisfaction during partnered sex, and help you experience multiple orgasms.

Today, we are going to explore five key reasons why you should try out a new sex toy or two. Or four. Or more. Who’s counting?

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squirt blog sex with emilyAhhhh, squirting. The holy grail of female pleasure. The myth, the legend, the bed sheets!

Now whether or not you’ve squirted, you might be a little confused as to what exactly it is. Is it pee? Is it ejaculate? Perhaps a little super soaker some pornstars hide in their vagina? Truth be told, as with many aspects of vaginal health, there’s a lot of conflicting information about this aquatic phenomenon.

Today we’re going to set the record straight with this comprehensive guide to squirting. So, put on something waterproof, because we’re about to get wet and wild! 

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shame blog sex with emilyHave you ever had ‘that feeling’ after masturbating? You know the one. That sense of dread, or that feeling of guilty shame. Have you ever climaxed, looked at what you were watching and felt truly disgusted with your nasty gutter brain.

Well, it turns out, those feelings come from a bunch of different places. It can be psychological, trauma-based, cultural, or generational.  But somehow, so often, shame surrounds masturbation.

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wand erotica blog sex with emilyYou know that feeling when you’re in a new relationship, and you just can’t wait to get home so you can ravage your beloved?

When you’re driving and you feel your hands clam up, the hairs on your arm stand erect, and you get so wet you’re afraid that you might ruin your new upholstery?

Well that’s how I feel…coming home to me.

It all started a few weeks ago when I decided to treat myself. I had just gone through a breakup with a guy who couldn’t or wouldn’t get me off and I thought, enough is enough. If he’s not going to do it, then I’m going to get it done. I’ve always been resourceful like that.

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kids parenting blog sex with emilyMay is Masturbation Month. And now with Covid-19, everyone is stuck at home. Your adolescent kids might have been feeling stifled and also discovering some of their, well, urges. What a great time to discuss masturbation with the whole family! 

But seriously, having an authentic and candid, yet age-appropriate discussion with your kids about masturbation is one of the biggest gifts you can give your children. It sets them up for a better perspective on sex in general and also can help boost their self-esteem.

Here are some tips on how to approach this sticky (sorry couldn’t help it) subject.

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