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vaginismus

Dear Emily,painful sex blog sex with emily

I’m a late bloomer when it comes to masturbation and having orgasms. (I didn’t even know that women could masturbate until I was in my twenties!)

Now I’m figuring out what turns me on, what movements I like, and what doesn’t work. I even have a wonderful partner who is totally on board to help me figure it out.

Sometimes when I masturbate, or when my partner fingers me to climax, this weird thing happens: My body spasms, and it’s kind of painful (usually in just the pelvic area).

I can’t hold my vibrator to my clit any longer or I push my partner’s hand away, even though I feel that I could have gone deeper into the orgasm. It totally keeps me from just melting into the experience.

I’m wondering if I’m pushing myself to climax before I’m fully warmed up? Is that a thing? Or is this a serious issue that I might have to get looked at?

Sincerely,

Leslie, 27

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Back in December, we here at Sex With Emily, asked you all to reflect on your sex life over the past year to see what you liked, what you didn’t, and what you could do to change things for the better. Then, we wanted to know what steps you were going to take to make sure 2018 was the year you became the best lover yet – with a partner and with yourself. Of course, we also made pledges of our own.

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