Meditate, Masturbate, Manifest

In these busy modern times, we often feel inundated with health advice. While we all want to do what’s best for us, picking a wellness practice and sticking to it can be tricky.

As a listener of the podcast, you’ve probably heard Emily say “meditate, masturbate, manifest” more than once. I mean, she even put it on a vibrating necklace…pretty sexy stuff if you ask me. She’s passionate about those things for a reason; they are good for you! 

So today I’m going to be teaching you about what each means. I’ll also show you how they benefit your sex life, and some tips for how to make them into a consistent habit. Ready? Let’s dive in. 

 

Meditate

Meditation is a pretty broad umbrella term, but it refers to the practice of using a technique to focus your mind. Some people use breathwork, mindfulness, or picking a specific object, thought, phrase, or activity to direct (and re-direct) their attention towards their goal and away from the everyday aspects of life. Regularly practicing meditation can help you achieve more mental clarity and emotional stability in your life. Simply put, it helps create a more peaceful state within you. 

But it’s not just that, studies also show that meditation has a whole host of other wonderful benefits. Meditation may decrease pain, increase attention spans, boost memory, lessen stress and anxiety, and promote greater self-awareness. 

 

What about sex?

Yep, regular meditation can be used to improve both partnered sex lives and solo ones. It can be really hard to go from the hustle and bustle of everyday life straight to the bedroom and expect to feel aroused. I’ve seen many of my clients get into self-judgment and criticism for not being able to access their arousal when they want to. Regular meditation helps lower stress and anxiety, both of which work as breaks to your libido. Now that’s a win for meditation. 

Not only that, meditation, and in particular mindfulness techniques, can really help bring people into their bodies. Spoiler alert, that’s where all the pleasure is! For expert support with your meditation practice, check out the amazing new wellness app, Simple Habit, for some beautiful guided meditations from Emily Morse herself.

 

Top Meditation Tip for Great Sex: 

Practice mindfulness techniques throughout your workday to bring more pleasure into your life without adding more time. Savor each bite of your lunch and notice all the textures, flavors, and sensations. Groove to some of your favorite tunes in your car and grind and roll your hips while you listen. Rub in your body lotion slowly and sensually instead of a quick slather and go. This small shift in focus will help keep your pilot light charged, and make it easier to switch into a sexual gear when you’re wanting to. 

 

Masturbate

Let the record state that having a sexual relationship with yourself is healthy and important! Masturbation helps you discover what types of touch you enjoy, explore where your desires and kinks lie, and helps boost your sexual confidence for partnered sex. 

Not surprisingly, studies show it’s also very good for your general health! It can improve sleep quality, boost your immune system, lowers stress, and reduces menstrual cramps and muscle tension. According to Gloria Brame, Ph.D. who’s a clinical sexologist, it also; “releases feel-good neurochemicals like dopamine and oxytocin that lift your spirits, boost your satisfaction, and activate the reward circuits in your brain”.

Now that’s some sexy science. For anyone reading who still feels worried that masturbation might negatively affect their partnered sex life, check out this article on sexual independence and its wonderful benefits. 

 

Top Masturbation Tip for Great Sex: 

Prioritize solo sex by scheduling it into your busy life. This will increase the chances of you actually making time for yourself in this important way. Try thinking of masturbation as just another tool in your self-care tool belt. 

 

Manifest

Ever since Oprah gave The Secret a boost into the limelight, manifestation has soared in popularity. Manifestation loosely refers to the concept within the Law of Attraction that what you focus on is what you receive. So you can use your thoughts, feelings, and beliefs to bring your desires forth into your physical life.  

But how do you do this? There are many different tools and techniques, and it’s essentially a hyper-focused and very intentional version of mindfulness, as we explored earlier. Here are some of the common tools people use to help with their manifestation:

1- Create vision boards to help visualize the end result of your desires.

2- Repetition of affirmations and mantras.

3- Post-it notes and phone alarms to reinforce positive beliefs.

4- Gratitude journals.

Try using manifestation to very consciously focus on what you want to achieve or receive in life. Next, pair it with actionable steps and watch it expand your life. For example, make sure that while you’re doing “great new career” manifestations, you’re also filling out awesome job applications and developing your skills!

 

Top Tip To Manifest Great Sex: 

Use manifestation for great sex through “sex-positive affirmations”. Write down a list of all the things you’d love to be true in your sex life, such as “it’s so easy for me to have powerful delightful orgasms”, and say it to yourself through the day. 

Then dress, eat, move, and act in the ways you think you might if it were already true. Write it on love notes for yourself and hide them around the house. Your body is surprisingly receptive to positive sexual reinforcement from your brain!

 

Forming Healthy Habits

So you’ve read through this far, and are thinking “these all sound great!”, and you’re keen to try them out. However, it can be daunting to decide where to begin, let alone figure out how to keep it up. Start by setting small, realistic goals for yourself. 

For example, schedule just 5 minutes every day to sit down and count your breaths. Commit to three 10 minute solo self-pleasure dates per week, and put them in your calendar with alerts to remind yourself. Set a silent alarm on your phone that goes off daily with your manifestations on it to keep you consistent. 

Before you know it, you’ll be a meditate, masturbate, manifest pro just like Emily, and reaping the benefits in your own life. 

 


Isabella Frappier is an Australian ex-pat living in LA, who swapped gumtrees for palm trees. She’s a writer and a holistic Sexuality Doula, who specializes in body literacy, sexual sovereignty, and BDSM.
She is also a host on the popular new Sex Magic Podcast. When she’s not busy championing her sex positive agenda, she—oh wait—she’s always busy doing that. Follow her adventures on Instagram.
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