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erectile dysfunction

men insecurities blog sex with emilyIf you’re human, chances are you probably have one or two things that you’re insecure about. All of us have self-esteem problems every now and then, but sometimes our gender identity has a role in the way we experience and deal with them.

In our experience, many folks who identify as men struggle to voice their insecurities, emotions and feelings. Some might argue that men are simply more confident, or that they feel less pressure to adhere to certain societal standards.

But “toxic masculinity,” or the dangerous limitation that describes manhood as being sexual, violent, status-driven, strong and aggressive, affects more than just women—it affects all of us. 

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Dear Emily,

I’ve been listening to your podcast and visiting your blog for a long time, and I want to thank you for being so inclusive.

Specifically, I’ve noticed you mentioning a lot of solutions for men with E.D.

Maybe I’m just paying attention more now because I now find myself in that category…

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Q: DEAR EMILY,

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First off, I love the show – thank you for everything you do! I’ll jump right to it – my husband has been struggling with erectile dysfunction for a few years now and it’s taking a toll on both of us. I want to stress that he hasn’t been ignoring it – he’s had prescriptions for both Viagra and Cialis, and they usually do the trick. However, the results have been less reliable lately.

The bigger issue, though, is that I think the situation is getting him depressed.

He’s 56 and until this started, we had a very active sex life. I’ve been listening to you for a while, and I know that communication is a lubrication – so we talk about it often, but that’s led to some tense situations and now we’re both feeling the weight of this condition.

I want to come up with a way to help him, or at least let him know that he’s not letting me down, even though that’s what he winds up thinking every time I bring it up. Help me do what’s right here, Emily!

Sincerely,

Cyndy, 54, NM

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Q: Dear Emily,

I’m recently divorced and began listening to your show to elevate my game before reentering the dating pool. Thank you for delivering great information in such an entertaining way! I am now in a relationship with a lovely woman ten years my junior (I’m 56) and have been having some issues “down there.”

I wasn’t concerned at first, but now it seems I lose my erection more than I can keep it. I’ve never had trouble staying hard before, and while I recognize I’m not a 25-year-old anymore, I’m starting to worry. Where should I look for a solution? Are pills the best answer?

Thanks for your help here and for all you do,

Jay, 56, OR

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