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The world of sex is so vast and diverse, it can be hard to keep up.

Most people are pretty familiar with the heterosexual, cisgender, monogamous model of sex and sexual expression, but there is so much more out there. In honor of getting back to basics, because let’s be honest, we could all use a refresher now and then, we’re bringing you the “ABC’s of Sex” series.

 

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Q: DEAR EMILY,

I am a 23-year-old lesbian, and my dating pool seems more like a puddle. I’m shy, so walking up to a woman in a bar isn’t really my thing. Conversely, I’m very feminine and have been told that women can’t easily tell that I’m gay, making me unapproachable for women who are too scared to ask.

Last but not least, I’ve noticed that I’m attracted to older women and find myself being intimidated by them because I’m not very sexually experienced.

Basically, I need suggestions on where to meet women and how to be more confident and put myself out there.

Please help!

Cassie, 23, Kentucky

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