Let’s talk about archetypes for a second. You know, those big, recurrent characters you see in books and movies, types that usually have roots in mythology. Think broad: The Hero, The Outlaw, The Sage.
And then we have…The Innocent.
When it comes to the schoolgirl fantasy, it helps to begin here. Why? Because any discussion of schoolgirl fantasy play can devolve into some weird territory if we’re not thoughtful about it. But fortunately, that’s not gonna happen! Because here we are, learning together.
So let’s unpack this one a bit. The schoolgirl fantasy gets its particular frisson from The Innocent archetype, which is all about trust and wide-eyed awe, combined with the implied repression of sexuality. “Schoolgirls” have their pop culture roots in Catholic schoolgirls (see: repressed sexuality), and some social psychologists even credit nuns as the template for our modern-day dominatrixes. Interesting, no?
On top of the innocence and repression, we also have…uniforms! Fetishized across the gender spectrum for trapping the individual, an individual who maybe – just maybe – will undo those buttons and zippers, to reveal their true, sexy self. Ooh la la.
So, it’s a heady stew of erotic ingredients, our schoolgirl fantasy. And between two consenting adults (keyword: adult), it’s a forum to play with ALL of these things, as well as some juicy power play.
If that sounds like a big yes to you, here are some ideas for enacting this popular role-play scenario, in all its erotic glory. Grab your plaid skirts…
Look the part.
If you want to bring out your inner school girl, go back to The Innocent and don your uniform. Where would a sexy schoolgirl be without the classic plaid, pleated short skirt? It’s irresistible and puts you in the right headspace for some flirty fun.
“Corrupt” the rest of your outfit by putting on a white button-up shirt and tying the ends high around your waist. Try out a lacy bra or go without—either can be super sexy. A man’s tie casually draped around your neck is optional but oh so hot. Finish the look with some knee-high socks and Mary Jane shoes, and if you need more ideas, Britney’s “Hit Me One More Time” music video is just a Google search away.
Practice your pout.
Part of the sexy schoolgirl aesthetic is body language. So perfect your pout by laying on some thick clear lip gloss, for starters. To get even more into it, open your eyes wide, lift your voice a tad higher, and cross your arms. (You might even consider sucking on a lollipop or blowing bubblegum.)
Cock your head to one side and give your partner sly smile…or a little lip bite. They won’t be able to resist.
Role-play with your partner.
To continue world-building this one, try assigning your partner a role of their own. Maybe they’re an authority figure, like a demanding headmaster – or a strict nun, with a penchant for rulers (wink wink).
At the heart of this fantasy is a classic power dynamic, so pair your Innocent with a dominant figure: ideally, one who likes to “punish” you. ” Maybe they boss you around. Maybe make you stand in the corner. Respond by throwing a temper tantrum, then demand something you want…or better yet, be coy and beg.
Another great way to role-play the sexy schoolgirl is to become a “brat.” Make some sassy comments to your partner and refuse to go along with anything they say. (Other tips for being a “brat:” smack your gum, roll your eyes, sarcastically say “whatever”…)
In any case, bringing out your inner brat can amp up your rebellious side and may also help you get “reprimanded” by your partner—in a great way.
Be a badass.
Schoolgirls know what’s what. They’re savvy, they’re conspiratorial, and they know how to bend the rules just so. Embody your smartest (even nerdiest) self when you put on your uniform, because your inner schoolgirl is smart AF. You can even “school” your partner on feminist ideals as you flirt and pout your way to getting what you want (in the bedroom and out).
Remember, this is consensual role-play—your inner schoolgirl is a fun, playful side of you that is simultaneously powerful and intelligent.
Unleash your erotic, innocent self.
Sex is how adults play, and play in the bedroom can be a cornerstone to opening up your erotic self to your partner.
As Esther Perel puts it: “Eroticism isn’t sex; it’s sexuality transformed by the human imagination.” So use your imagination, and lean into that feigned innocence – it’s all pretend, combined with a little sass. That’s textbook schoolgirl for you: a knowing “good girl” who decides to be a little naughty. Have fun!
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Emily Anne is a bestselling author, sex coach, and educator, who specializes in helping people expand their sexual horizons through BDSM and kink. When she’s not obsessively talking about sex, she’s hiking through the Hollywood Hills. Get some sexy education on her Instagram feed.