How’s advanced is your ‘clit-eracy’ knowledge? There is a whole world of amazing language to describe different clitoral stimulation techniques, whether alone or with a partner. Many vulva-owners and their partners have some tried-and-true methods for clit stimulation, but we want you to expand your sexual vocabulary.
Clit Stimulation Massage Fundamentals
Before we dive into the exciting juicy stuff, it’s important we get the basics down pat: Pleasure-focused exploration is the goal, and orgasms are delightful bonuses. You don’t always have to do full-blown massage/clit stimulation sessions to use these tools, but once you know what your partner likes you can incorporate them at any time of day. Remember, communication is key when it comes to clit stimulation. Chat together in advance about preferences and boundaries, and keep that line of communication flowing during the massage time.
Also, note that this is by no means a comprehensive list—it’s just a juicy place to start. Many of these techniques for clitoral stimulation can be done with fingers or tongues, so if you have a partner to play with, give both a try and see which you prefer.
8 Delightful Clit Touches
1. Hinting
Hinting is where you pass by all the parts that turn you on the most, in a delicious form of torment, only occasionally pausing to indulge. You may want to draw lightly along your stomach, moving closer and closer to the clit before skimming over it and tracing a path along the inner thighs, moving back to briefly alight on it again. For many clit-owners, this technique leads to very strong orgasms once they allow themselves the release.
2. Edging
To practice edging, you stimulate the clitoris in its favorite way, but as you (or your partner) approach climax, you back off and allow a little come down. This is repeated as the suspense builds until orgasm is either allowed or simply cannot be held back any longer.
3. Surprising
The surprise technique can help the receiver stay out of their head and feel very present to their pleasure and grounded in their body. This move involves regularly switching up the technique in order to defy expectations. This can also be done solo; even though your brain might know what you’re doing, you’ll keep your clit guessing.
4. Accenting
Accenting is when you place increased pressure on the parts that feel the best. Essentially this means you’re paying extra attention to the specific part of the motion that feels best, whether that’s tapping, circling, or stroking.
5. Layering
Using the layering technique is particularly good for people with very sensitive clits. You give the clit indirect pleasure through the surrounding skin. You may like to do this hands-free by crossing your legs and rocking your hips to rub the clit between the outer labia. For a more focused sensation, try gently stroking the clit by grasping the inner labia with your thumb and forefinger and gently rocking them back and forth between your fingers. (You’re like the salt bae of clits.)
6. Orbiting
Just like the earth orbits the sun, you too can make the clit the center of your solar system by orbiting it. This is when you circle the clit in a way that feels the best. Experiment with big circles for indirect stimulation, small circles right over the clit for a more intense feeling, or start with a large circle and gradually spiral it smaller until you’re directly on the clit.
7. Consistency
Consistency is when you figure out which touch style feels the best for you and then stick with that, keeping everything exactly the same, no changes. The orgasm is built by keeping consistency, so keep that train straight on the tracks; no stops! Some people like to switch to this method once they are at a 7 out of 10 on the orgasmic scale, others prefer this move the entire time. This is a very commonly preferred style, so make sure to give this one a try.
8. Rhythm
The rhythm technique is almost a musical touch style, the melody of your orgasm if you will. This is most easily produced by using a vibrating toy that has a rhythm option (like the Magic Wand), but can also be done with fingers or tongues. Try a few different motions until you find the one that works. You could try circles, figure eights’, ovals, pausing between motions, or skipping an aspect of the motion every second time.
9. Butterfly Kiss
Using a feather-light touch, gently alight your finger onto the clitoral hood. Then, with an intentional, present, but very soft touch, gently stroke and tickle the clitoris. Imagine how softly a butterfly’s wings feel brushing against your skin. Use either a slow or fast stroking speed, whichever the receiver prefers.
10. Clocking In
Imagine that the clitoris is the center of a clock, with 12 o-clock being at the top. With one finger, make tiny circles right against the sides of the clit, stopping at the location of each ‘hour’ of the clock. Tell your partner what ‘time’ each stroke is, and ask for feedback as to which place they most like to be touched. They may enjoy rating each on a scale of 1-5. Every vulva-owner will have different preferences, so listen carefully, learn, and repeat.
11. Sexual Slip n’ Slide
This technique calls for lots and lots of lubricant. Once you’ve worked lots of lube over the vulva, try to gently pinch and pull the clit. If you’re actually able to, you need a lot more lube. With this move, you’ll be stimulating the clitoral hood, with the shaft underneath receiving indirect massage.
Whichever technique you use, the trick is to keep experimenting and keep the lines of communication open. You (and your partner) will be clit-erate in no time.
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Isabella Frappier is an Australian writer and a holistic Sexuality Doula, who specializes in body literacy and sexual sovereignty. She is also a host on the popular new Sex Magic Podcast. When she’s not busy championing her sex-positive agenda, she—oh wait—she’s always busy doing that. Follow her adventures on Instagram.
