We all know how much I love my Sybian. Well last month, I got the opportunity to speak with the mastermind behind it all, Dave Lambert, to find out just how he was able to his bring idea for an innovative pleasure product to life.
Thirty years ago, Dave realized that women were not getting the orgasms they deserved during intercourse. He knew that the woman-on-top position was the best way for them to achieve these orgasms, due of the direct contact with the g-spot and clitoris, which got him thinking. How could he take what he knew about female pleasure and turn it into a product women could truly benefit from? In 1985, he created the Sybian, an amazing device that could help women have those elusive g-spot orgasms, and better yet, learn how to transfer these orgasms to sex with their partner.
Listen to the full interview below and follow along as Dave and I talk all about this revolutionary sex toy!
Emily: I just want to know how you came up with the idea that something like this was needed.
Dave: My personal experiences told me clear back then that women of the world are getting the short end of the stick when it comes to sex, and sexuality, and response, and enjoyment, and my life experience has told me that all women can learn to be easily and multipally orgasmic. I realized that something needed to be done to see if we can help change the fact, of getting women to be able to enjoy sex multiples more than they do now.
E: You realized that women had all this potential, but they were getting the short end of the stick sexually. So what was it? Was there someone that sat down and said listen you know, ‘that wasn’t good for me,’ or you knew more about orgasms from your background?
The fact is that somebody has to be saying and pushing it and trying to teach it and that’s essentially what I’m trying, have tried to do, over the years. And you said that the machine is a well accomplished teaching tool. If women use the Sybian and use it as I have proposed in my instructions and so forth, they can learn to change their sexual habits drastically.
E: Let’s talk about this, the actual mechanics of it, and the training.
Sex and response to sexual stimulation is something that a woman learns, it’s not something that they inherit or anything like that. It’s something that they learn the same as they learn any other physical activity, whether it be sports or it be anything. If you’re a basketball player, you become a good basketball player because you train and you shoot baskets, and you keep training. The same thing applies to sex. If you train your body, your body can respond better and easier and faster and for almost all women, the use of Sybian will cause things to happen that they didn’t even know existed.
E: Can you talk about how couples use it together as well?
We include a stool with every Sybian and the purpose of the stool is for the partner to sit on. He’s set facing her, that’s the best way to do it in my opinion, you can do it other ways, you can do it from behind, but the best way is face each other. He puts his arms around her, he puts his legs around her, she puts her arms around him, and they have sex and if everything is conducted in a loving way, the woman can be using the Sybian and she is just making love to her partner. The hardest thing for people to understand and do is to push themselves to go further. If you’re using Sybian and you have an orgasm, you ride that orgasm as long as you can and then that might be a minute, two minutes, whatever, and then you kind of reach a point where you just can’t go on. Well, the idea is to turn off the vibration for ten seconds and turn it back on again. Just keep repeating it, you’ll have five orgasms, you’ll have ten orgasms, you’ll thirty orgasms, you’ll have fifty orgasms.
E: So can you just explain to me the attachments as well and about the different controls and exactly how that works, and how it relates to actually having intercourse with your partner?
The woman has to be in control, and whenever a couple’s having sex, the woman should have control of the first portion of the period and by having control, and in this case, that generally means being on top of the partner, she’s the one that does the moving. She controls what’s happening, and if she has that control, and she has practiced it and done it repeatedly, when she starts was on the machine, a humping motion, she’s not supposed to raise up and down like in a pumping motion, but she stays fully in contact with his body and she moves her hips forward and back from the waist down, she doesn’t move the whole body. From the waist up, the body doesn’t need to move, and the power should be moving forward, and not moving back. When she’s in control, she’s gonna have orgasms and she’s gonna have them for as long as the guy can stand keeping an erection.
E: What would you say to a woman who is like, “yeah, I knew that, I’m on top, I go back and forth, but I’ve still never had an orgasm.” How would you explain to both of them, someone who is like, “no, it just doesn’t work for me in that way”?
It does work and the only reason it doesn’t work is because they haven’t done it enough, they haven’t practiced. A woman doesn’t have to have a Sybian in order to learn this. There’s three ways that I classify: you can do it totally by yourself and manually, you can buy some toys and hand vibrators and things to do it, or you can get a Sybian and accomplish it a lot faster and a lot easier.
E: A lot of women, you know, are focused on their partner’s pleasure and they’re not thinking, well I got to move this way, that way, and the Sybian gives..
Another reason why they aren’t getting the gratification. It should be the opposite, they should demand that they get to go first, and they get to have their orgasms. And when they have had them to a certain extent, then she will be happy to let the man have whatever position he wants, pump in and out, whatever he wants, but she demands that she gets her share first.
E: I’m wondering, was there you know kind of like negative attention or feedback on it where you were like, “what, what are you talking about?”
We got the machine– started perfecting the machine, we went regularly to swing functions. We did it weekly at least for months, and we had women try it out. We’d sit there and observe and give instructions and ask questions and that’s how we were able to perfect this machine to the quality that we have today and have always had. And it was totally a feedback situation from women. Not what I wanted, it’s what they wanted, and were they getting it. That’s how we did the verification of what we were doing. And we would listen to the women very intently and try to accommodate what they were talking about.
E: Then came the attachments, and they’re so amazing, so many different sizes and shapes.
The various parts, I mean, are to try to satisfy different desires and interests and so forth. The double is an example where it inserts both vaginally and anally at the same time. There’s a lot of women that dislike this, but there’s some that like it, and so you accommodate them. And some of them like bigger, so you make bigger for them, and some of them like smaller so you make smaller for them. We got a g-mini and a g-max. One of the things that is necessary when a person is using the Sybian, is that they will stay in contact with what we call the rubber piece, the contact piece, the rubber, at all times, and they need to stay in contact with it. The point I wanted to say is that the more erect they are, the more stimulation they’re going to get on the front wall of the vagina where the g-spot is.
E: What do you think of men who are like, ‘is it gonna replace me? She’s not going to need me anymore, I don’t understand why she needs a toy when she has my penis?”
Well, let me try to answer your question a little bit backwards. First of all, there are a certain number of men that are opposed to their partners using it. The reason behind that is that individual is not very confident in his abilities. The fact is, that the more she uses it, the more she’s going to want him and a far better partner she’s going to be.