How to Have (Or Give) a Nipplegasm

woman in skin-colored lingerie pulling her bra

Nipples are having a moment right now. Maybe it’s because nipple play feels just accessible enough, compared to other forms of sexploration. It’s just the kind of vanilla-friendly, kink-approved sex act that works for almost everyone…especially because they offer a fun way to orgasm. 

So let’s talk about nipplegasms: what they are, how to have or give one, and who can experience them. 

What’s a nipplegasm?

An orgasm – yes, a real orgasm, the kind you feel right around your genitals – prompted by nipple stimulation.

A classic orgasm is a series of muscle contractions in your pelvic floor muscles. Most of the time, they happen because your genitals have been stimulated: either your penis, or your clitoris. And that makes intuitive sense, because your genitals are close to your pelvic floors. They’re next-door neighbors inside your anatomy. 

But as it turns out, genital stimulation isn’t the only thing that prompts orgasm.

Are nipplegasms real?

Yes, but it might take a few tries to experience one. 

Can anyone have one?

A definitive yes. All genders. Nipples contain sensitive nerve endings and stimulating them properly is the key to a nipplegasm. 

Why do nipplegasms happen?

Because the nerve endings inside your nipples stimulate the same region of your brain as the nerve endings in your genitals: the genital sensory cortex. 

The science of orgasm is fascinating, and research is ongoing. But for your personal, at-home purposes, all you need to know is that orgasm happens as the result of neural signals in your brain, working in tandem with increased blood flow throughout your body. (This is why I’m always saying that your brain is your largest sex organ!)

When your genitals or your nipples are stimulated pleasurably, the part of your brain responsible for triggering orgasm lights up. Once the stimulation threshold is reached, nerve signals prompt rhythmic contractions of your pelvic floor muscles. Et voila: an awesome orgasm. 

How do I have a nipplegasm?

Know this: it’ll probably take more than one try. But there are certain things that help you have one faster.

You can certainly commit to the cause using two of your best sex tools (your hands) or you can up the ante with vibrating nipple clamps – a toy that works just like a vibrator, and very much help trigger nipplegasms. That’s because the vibrations stimulate deeper nerve endings than your hand or fingers can, traveling further inside your body for more pleasurable sensations. A typical method I recommend is:

  • Lay down on your bed and get completely relaxed.
  • Close your eyes, take deep breaths, and start dropping into your body. If it helps you fully relax, clean your bed/room beforehand, light a candle, and put on some hot music.
  • Warm some lotion or body oil, by rubbing it between your hands, then start rubbing all over your chest. This gets your blood flowing.
  • Start stimulating your nipples: pinching, rolling them between your fingers, squeezing. Some of us prefer a light touch, some like it harder. 
  • Put your vibrating nipple clamps on. I use the Sphinx from Ohmibod
  • Press the “on” button on the remote. Keep breathing deeply.
  • At this point, you can use your free hands to stimulate your genitals with a hand or even another toy.

It’s likely you’ll orgasm from this added genital stimulation. But over time, you’ll get closer to orgasming from just nipple stimulation. This is a fun skill you can transfer over to partner play. 

How do I give a nipplegasm? 

This is a question I get a lot, and one I always preface by saying: everyone’s orgasm is their own responsibility. You’re responsible for yours, I’m responsible for mine, etc. So, please don’t pressure yourself to go around giving nipplegasms! The ability to experience one is highly dependent on the person, and how much time they’ve spent getting to know their own body.

That said, here are my go-to tips for nipple play that support orgasm:

  • Tease. I truly can’t say it enough! To build arousal, you want your partner to feel like they can’t wait for you to touch them directly, so resist the urge to go there all at once. Caress their chest over their clothes first: squeeze their breasts, rub a hand over their chest, stimulate their nipples while their top is still on.
  • Use your hands and fingers to rub the entire chest, warming up the area.
  • Start using your fingers to squeeze their nipples, and checking in (“how’s this?”) so you’re not accidentally triggering a fight-or-flight response. Listen for the telltale sounds of pleasure, like deep breathing and moaning, to guide the pressure of your fingers.
  • Lick their nipples lightly, then suck a bit harder, depending on their preferences. Some people like nibbles or bites, some people like a lot of sucking – explore together and see what feels good.
  • While you’re using your mouth on their nipples, you can use your hands to stimulate their genitals: fingering, hand job, etc. 

You’ll notice that both here and above, I recommend doing nipple stimulation with genital stimulation simultaneously. That’s because we’re building a new pathway to pleasure and orgasm, and it’s helpful to loop in a method that already prompts orgasm, like genital stimulation. Over time, the body gets acclimated, and can start associating nipple play with orgasm. 

Does anyone not like nipple play?

Yes, and it’s absolutely valid. Here are a few reasons someone may not want nipple play:

  • Regardless of gender, a person can have a lot of nerve endings in their nipples – so many that stimulation feels uncomfortable or painful.
  • A person may also have a negative, past association with nipple play. 
  • They’re a new mom and they’re nursing. They might be “touched out” from using their breasts to nurse a baby, which can desensitize nerve endings here. Speaking of new moms, they might psychologically need a break from nipple play for a while. It can take a beat to reclaim this body part for their sexual pleasure, rather than feeling like their breasts are here to serve one more person. 

For all of these reasons, nipple play isn’t for everyone – and that’s OK! 

Can I “train” my nipples for orgasm?

You sure can. The aforementioned clamps are a wearable sex toy made to be worn with or without clothes. You can wear them in all kinds of ways for orgasmic nipple training:

  • On a FaceTime call with your long-distance partner. If you like, they can even get on the toy’s app and control vibrations from afar. 
  • Out dancing: the Sphinx has Club Vibe Mode setting, which syncs vibrations to the beat of ambient music. How fun is that?
  • At home: you can also sync Sphinx to Music Mode, which connects to your Spotify/Apple playlist. From there, it syncs vibrations to the beat of the music. 
  • Masturbating: I mentioned this one above, but wearing vibrating nipple clamps while you’re masturbating with another sex toy can create quite the bodygasm. 

Intrigued? Ready to unlock new pathways to orgasm? Remember, everyone’s journey to pleasure is unique, so take your time, experiment, explore, and most importantly, breathe.

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