Who’s ready for a ride?

Obviously you, reading this article (busted) – but when it comes to cowgirl and reverse cowgirl, there are a few key things to know. 

These are deeply satisfying sex positions, but for max pleasure we all need some positioning pointers. You might’ve enjoyed these positions a lot already, but we promise they’ll feel even better with these tips. Let’s saddle up.  

Meet Cowgirl

Cowgirl has the giving partner lying on their back, with the receiving partner on top and upright.

The receiving partner has their knees bent in a kneeling position, shins flush with the surface. They’re straddling their partner, who is supporting their body weight.

Meet Reverse Cowgirl

Same same, but the receiving, top partner is turned around. They are still upright, but now facing their partner’s feet.

In both positions, each partner has lots of freedom with their hands. 

Why do people love Cowgirl and Reverse Cowgirl? 

One word: visuals. 

Cowgirl gives both partners full-scale view of the breasts and/or chest, and lots of eye contact. It’s also great for erotic expression: the top partner can lean back, brace themselves with their hands, touch themselves (more on that momentarily)…lots of options. 

Meanwhile, Reverse Cowgirl gives quite the booty view. If extended eye contact feels a little vulnerable, this is an excellent choice. Receiving, top partners can also arch the back to emphasize booty fullness. 

Both positions allow for deep penetration, and the extra space between you means you’ve got room for other things. We are huge, huge! fans of bringing sex toys to sex and believe this should be normalized. With these positions especially, the top partner has lots of space to use a vibrator on the clitoris. Take advantage of this opportunity, and the top partner just might have a blended orgasm: the holy grail of pleasure.

Tricks to make Cowgirl feel even better

Maybe you’ve done it tons before, but this sex position is still considered medium-level in terms of comfort and ability. Here’s what I recommend to make it feel good for both people: 

Lean back and apply clitoral stimulation.

For those with a vagina, Cowgirl feels amazing on the G-spot. The head of the penis reaches far back in the vaginal canal, hitting the internal clitoral network. But if you’ve got a small vibrator handy, you can also stimulate the external clitoral nub. This combo makes the resulting orgasm MUCH bigger.

If you’re still getting used to the sound of a buzzing toy during sex, try a small, quiet, bullet vibe like the MIA 3 from LELO. It’s an 100% waterproof, lipstick-inspired clitoral vibrator made of ultra-smooth silicone, that is silent and tapered at the end, so you can pinpoint the stimulation. Try:

• Turning the toy on one of the lower power settings (it has 8 total)
• Lean back with your upper body
• Use one hand to brace yourself on the surface, the other to apply the tapered end of the toy to your clitoris
• Experiment with the “flat” end of the toy for more broad stimulation across your clitoris
• Once you find the surface that feels best, keep it pressed into your body during penetration 

The clitoral stimulation + G-spot stimulation takes this already hot position to an 11. Enjoy!

*Get 25% off the MIA 3 with code “SEXWITHEMILY” at LELO. 

Consider a sex wedge.

Receiving partners, if Cowgirl doesn’t feel good on your knees, try putting a sex wedge underneath your thighs for support. Made with a high-density foam core, sex wedges have less give than regular pillows and are the right call for cranky joints. 

Explore other leg placements.

You can try “Extended” Cowgirl by untucking your legs. Put them out in front of you so you’re sitting on your partner, supporting yourself on your hands as you lean back. 

Hold their hips.

Giving partners can help control the rhythm by placing their hands on their partners hips, which also lets you pull them in deeper. 

Tricks to make Reverse Cowgirl feel even better

Don’t over-arch your back.

Depending on the giving partner’s size and anatomy, Reverse Cowgirl can feel uncomfortable for some receivers. To make the sensation less intense, tuck your pelvis under slightly. 

Use a toy.

Toys to the rescue! Because you’re facing away from one another, this is also a nice opportunity to use a clitoral vibe as you have lots of space. Vibrations also help relax all the tiny muscles supporting your genitals, so if Reverse Cowgirl feels a tad bit intense, this will help. 

Let the top partner set the rhythm.

Real talk, Reverse Cowgirl can hurt if we’re not careful. Allow the receiving partner to set the pace and depth to ensure the comfort of their internal organs. (And to ensure the penis doesn’t overly tilt in the wrong direction.) 

And there you have it! Two of your fave sex positions, upgraded. Try these tips next time for an ace-high ride. 

Want to learn more about sex positions – and how to make them amazing? Ask me anytime inside my membership platform, SmartSX, submit your Qs to Ask Emily, or sign up for my newsletter and get sex secrets on the regular.