Let’s cut to the chase: pegging is in. And for very good reason. 

A sex act where one person wears a strap-on dildo, and uses it to penetrate the anus of their partner, “pegging” as a term is relatively new…but the practice is not. It can be traced back as far as Ancient Egypt (what can’t?), but it wasn’t until 2001 when Dan Savage coined the term with the help of his Savage Love community. And thus, a star sex phrase was born. 

While anyone can be penetrated, there’s a special benefit for penis owners. Just like vulva owners have G-spot orgasms – those deep, internal orgasms that feel like your entire core is throbbing – penis owners can have prostate or “P-spot” orgasms, which yield a similarly internal, explosive O. How? By having their prostate gland stimulated, accessible only via the anus. Enter: the strap-on dildo. 

Since 2020, sales of strap-ons have increased nearly 200% for online sex toy retailer Lovehoney, and that’s just one brand, folks. Likely due to increased pop culture exposure (think Broad City) and our ever-evolving views of masculinity and femininity, more folks feel liberated now to try it. So how do you dive in?

Let’s discuss the 4 “pegs” of pegging, so you can have satisfying strap-on sex. Remember: you do not have to be an adult film actor to pull this off! Unless you are one already, in which case, keep shining. 

1. Who can peg?

Anyone. While prostate stimulation is a treat for penis owners, there’s only a thin membrane wall in the anus separating a vulva owner from their G-spot. If they are pegged, they can experience an anal orgasm as well, which is SO great. 

2. How does it work?

Maybe it sounds straightforward – strap on dildo, penetrate partner – but there’s a looot to consider to have your best strap-on sex.

• The first is prep. Just like you wouldn’t pop into the splits without stretching, the same goes for our sphincter muscles. If someone is going to be pegged (the “pegee” if you will), they would be wise to do some anal training in advance. This can happen alone or with a partner: a partner can give them digital penetration to help their sphincter muscles relax and become more pliable. But alone, the pegee can insert butt plugs during solo or partnered sex, or truly…anytime. Plugs train the sphincter muscles to “give” more during penetration, and do not worry, you can’t permanently stretch out your anus. This step simply adds more elasticity to your already elastic anal opening. 
• Another note, pegees. It’s not a bad idea to clean out 30 to 60 minutes before playtime, with a body-safe enema. While waste is actually not stored in your anus – it’s stored in your upper bowels – fecal matter can be present in the lower bowels. Not a huge deal, but if you know you’d feel more secure if you’re sparkling clean there, consider this step. 
• Next: the person doing the pegging (the “pegger”) should get comfortable with their strap-on. That could look like literally walking around the house in it, to make sure nothing is chafing or feeling uncomfortable. What you want to feel is a firm, snug fit with your harness or underwear, so that it doesn’t feel like anything is slipping off, but neither is it so tight you’re losing blood circulation. 
• Finally, let’s talk in-the-moment foreplay and positions. Before jumping right into pegging, I recommend ample anal play first, such as fingering or rimming. Not only are these things super erotic, they build anticipation for the fireworks to come.

As for positions, please apply lots of lube and consider the following: do you want the pegee to set the rhythm, or the pegger? 

If the latter, doggy style is a nice option, in all its variations. The pegee could be on all fours or lying down on their stomach while the pegger enters, or, you could take this same configuration standing up, depending on each person’s height. If the former, cowboy/cowgirl is lovely, with the pegger laying down on their back, and the pegee sitting upright straddling them, setting both rhythm and penetrative depth. 

Whatever position you try, communication and patience are paramount. If you’re brand new to this, expect it to feel experimental at first. That’s because it is! With more experience, you’ll eventually be able to sink into the moment, and not think so hard about the logistics. 

3. What equipment is required?

Now let’s get into the nitty-gritty of what you will need. 

• The pegger will need a strap-on dildo, harness, and/or strapless briefs. An alternative for vulva owners is the strapless dildo, where instead of a harness or briefs, a rounded portion of the dildo sits inside the wearer, relying on the strength of the pegger’s pelvic floor to hold in place – while also stimulating their own vulva. Penis owners can also use a strapless dildo, which fits over their penis as an extender. 
• Everyone will need lots of lube. Do check to ensure your dildo material is compatible with your lube: silicone lube can degrade the quality of silicone toys. 
• Another good tool to bring to the party is a towel, which you can throw down for easy cleanup. Remember: sex is messy! And you both may need to be part of the cleanup crew when all is said and done. No shame, and remember – you’ve got a towel. 

4. What are the benefits of pegging?

Potentially awesome anal orgasms, for one. But there are benefits that go way beyond the bedroom.

• For penis owners, prostate massage reduces inflammation and the risk of prostate cancer. 
• If the partner pairing is a straight couple, the role reversal allows penis owners to experience sex from their partner’s perspective. When I asked my SWE community on Instagram what they thought about pegging, one individual said that it made him a better, more empathetic top. Another said, “I love being bent over, it’s such a treat. I really wish more women were into it!” And several shared that pegging increased intimacy between partners, helping penis owners open up and become more emotionally vulnerable. 
• For vulva owners, the novelty of being the pegger can be a huge turn-on, experiencing dominance in the bedroom in a new, exciting way. It’s also fulfilling to know you can provide a fresh kind of pleasure to your partner, no matter what genitals your pegging partner has. 
• In fact, studies have shown that vulva owners who engage in anal sex have more orgasms and more intense orgasms than their non-anal-play counterparts, which just goes to show that variety is the spice of life, and more to the point, the spice of sex.

While pegging requires a leap of faith on everyone’s part, it’s an opportunity to unlock wildly new levels of eroticism and pleasure. Use this guide as a starting point on your anal adventure, and enjoy seducing the booty once and for all.