If there’s one Valentine’s Day sentiment that we can all agree on, it’s probably this: expressions of sex, love and romance certainly shouldn’t be limited to one day. And that’s especially true for self-love.
For this month, your challenge is to have solo sex every day! But each day is a little different, with its own special twist. By the end, you’ll have gained a ton of knowledge about your body and unique arousal patterns, your turn ons and of course…your orgasms.
Some of these days require supplies, so scan the full list before you dive in. You can find everything you need at Shop With Emily, your one stop-shop for sex toys, sexual wellness products and sextras. Alternatively, feel free to repeat your favorite supply-free days.
I’m sooo excited for you to have an entire month of masturbation, and see how good you feel at the end of it. Are you ready lovers? Let’s dive in.
Track your progress with our downloadable February Solo Sex Challenge calendar
WEEK 1: Explore Your Body
The goal for this week is touching your entire body while you masturbate – not just your genitals. You’ll wake up pleasure zones you didn’t even know you had.
1. Mindful Masturbation
Break out of your hit-it-and-quit it routine, and slow down your solo sex. You’re bound to have a more gratifying orgasm. Here are 6 tips for trying mindful masturbation.
2. Love Your Inner Thighs
Caress, softly scratch, or squeeze your inner thighs while you masturbate. As a primary erogenous zone, they turn on your arousal big time.
3. Tease Your Nipples
Did you know that stimulating nipples activates the same brain regions as stimulating the genitals? Try squeezing yours when you masturbate today, or take it a step further with a specialized teasing toy.
4. Find Your Perineum
It’s the area between your genitals and anus, and packed with ultra sensitive nerve endings. Apply lube and rub here while you masturbate, or make things even more exciting and add a textured toy.
5. Play With Touch
Experiment with different types of pressure today while you masturbate. Soft, light touch vs. hard grabs, fingernails vs. palm of your hand. Note what feels best.
6. Make It a Vibe
See how your body reacts when you apply specific vibration. If you’ve got a penis, you don’t even need to be erect to use this toy – it’ll build you up to a powerful release. If you’ve got a vulva, this innovative toy lets you vibe without numbing out your clitoris.
7. Moan Loudly
One of the best ways to deepen your orgasm? Be vocal about it! Moaning is a documented arousal trigger, helping your O’s feel even better.
8. REST AND REFLECT
What was your favorite activity this week? Write it down so you can try it again soon!
WEEK 2: Explore Your Turn-Ons
The goal for this week is to hone in on your turn-ons and fantasies, and figure out what gets you aroused.
1. Fantasize Freely
Lean into sexual fantasies while you masturbate, and write down what you saw. Need inspo? This episode should help.
2. Watch Sexy Media
Whether it’s a hot movie scene or ethical porn, watch others have sex today before you masturbate. Let the images linger in your mind, as you touch yourself.
3. Try Audio Erotica
Listen to a sexy story while you masturbate today. My personal favorites are Dipsea and TryQuinn.
4. Restrain Yourself
Hold yourself back – literally. Tie up one of your wrists, and see how that changes your solo sex game. This gorgeous gift set comes with a silk restraint and a toy.
5. Switch Up Your Position
Put a sex pillow underneath your hips, use your toys in a whole new way, try solo sex standing up. How does it feel to masturbate this way?
6. Remember Your Hottest Sex
Think back to your personal best sex or the hottest sex you’ve ever seen. Keep it front of mind while you masturbate today.
7. Wear Something Hot
Time to turn yourself on. Before you masturbate, wear something sexy today – and wear it out in the world. Use the positive attention to fuel your solo sex session.
8. REST AND REFLECT
What was your favorite activity this week? Write it down so you can try it again soon!
WEEK 3: Engage Your Senses
The goal for this week is to turn your solo sex into full-sensory experiences. Think of it as going on a hot date – with yourself.
1. Light Candles
Turn out the lights, and turn your bedroom into a sexy candlelit cave. Something about flickering lights – so primal, so sexy.
2. Try Sensation Play
Try a bodysafe candle like this one (it smells incredible), and drip a little of the melted wax into your hands or directly on your body. The heat will send your nervous system into full-on arousal mode.
3. Just Add Water
Masturbate in the shower today. Here are 8 hot ways to do it.
4. Use Suction
Vibration and hands aren’t the only way to masturbate, you can use suction too. This toy feels like A+ oral sex for those with a vulva, while this stroker feels like someone going down on you, if you’ve got a penis.
5. Ice It
You’ve tried heat, today you’ll try cold. Rub an ice cube along your nipples, inner thighs, even genitals while you masturbate.
6. Feel (A Little) Pain
Ahh, pain play: one of the most popular kinks around. Did you know you can do it to yourself, with pinches, scratches, and temperature? Try it today while you masturbate, listen to this episode for ideas.
7. Record Yourself
Use your sight, and record yourself while you masturbate (just save it in your phone’s “Hidden” folder). Watching yourself in fully liberated pleasure can be a huge turn on.
8. REST AND REFLECT
What was your favorite activity this week? Write it down so you can try it again soon!
WEEK 4: New Ways to Masturbate
The goal for this week is to experiment during solo sex, and boldly try new things.
1. Try Edging
Build up to an intense orgasm by edging: getting close to your orgasm, backing off, then getting close again. I’ve got a full edging guide right here.
2. Do It In Public
…Discreetly. This panty vibe is app-controlled, so you can do the most basic tasks (grocery shopping, filing taxes) with a sexy secret. This adorable anal plug is also remote-controlled, for quiet-yet-thrilling anal action.
3. Incorporate Anal
Speaking of anal, work it into today’s solo sex sesh. These vibrating plugs are designed to help your sphincter muscles relax, so after you mindfully insert, do your solo sex as usual. Enjoy a brand new orgasm as a result.
4. Massage The Prostate
It’s the magical gland that leads to seeing-stars orgasms, if you’ve got a penis. This toy is pro for stimulating it.
5. Massage The G-Spot
It’s the key to squirting, if you’ve got a vulva. This toy is tops for that oh-so-powerful G-spot orgasm (and possibly squirting).
6. Try Dual Stimulation
Try having two orgasms at once. This toy is legendary for getting folks there, if you’ve got a vulva. This one massages your prostate and your perineum, while you pleasure your penis.
7. Use Your Toy (In a New Way)
Did you know you can use a penis ring on your fingers? Or, that you can chill your insertion toys for exciting temperature play? Experiment with your sex toys today (here’s a whole list of hacks), and feel how different the sensations are.
8. REST AND REFLECT
What was your favorite activity this week? Write it down so you can try it again soon!
You did it! You had a whole month of solo sex, and your body thanks you.
Tell us how you did with the hashtag #solosexchallenge, and come find me on Instagram and TikTok @sexwithemily to share your fave activities. I can’t wait to hear what new tricks you’ve got up your sleeve.
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