In this essential bonus episode of the Sex with Emily podcast, Dr. Emily tackles one of the most common and complicated questions in modern relationships: Does watching porn count as cheating? If you’ve ever felt that stomach-dropping moment when you discovered your partner’s browser history, or wondered if your own porn consumption crosses a line, this episode is for you.
Dr. Emily cuts straight through the confusion to reveal that there’s no universal answer to this question—but if it’s coming up in your relationship, there’s something deeper worth exploring. The real issue isn’t necessarily the porn itself, but whether this behavior is breaking trust and violating the agreements you’ve made with your partner.
We explore why so many couples never discuss porn until someone gets hurt, how childhood conditioning around secrecy affects our adult relationships, and why the shame and silence surrounding porn often cause more damage than the porn itself. Dr. Emily also addresses when porn consumption can become genuinely problematic and offers practical guidance for having these crucial conversations.
Key Topics Covered:
Why there’s no universal definition of cheating The difference between porn use and porn problems How secrecy and shame damage relationships more than porn, Why many people never discuss boundaries until it’s too late When porn consumption becomes genuinely concerning How to have honest conversations about digital boundaries Moving from assumptions to actual agreements
This episode emphasizes that porn doesn’t ruin relationships—it’s the lack of communication, transparency, and mutual understanding that creates problems. Whether you’re completely comfortable with porn or feel threatened by it, this episode provides the framework for having honest, productive conversations about digital intimacy boundaries.
Remember: Communication is always sexier than making assumptions and making your partner wrong.
Show Notes:
00:00 When Sex Becomes a Chore
03:00 The Psychology of Sexual Obligation
06:41 Mismatched Libidos and Relationship Dynamics
08:26 Breaking the Routine: Adding Variety and Play
11:07 Communication vs. Avoidance in Sexual Relationships
15:38 Priming for Pleasure Throughout the Week
18:06 Scheduling Sex: Intentional vs. Spontaneous Intimacy
23:10 From Duty to Desire: Practical Strategies
28:14 Building Anticipation and Connection
30:04 Redefining Sexual Success and Satisfaction
Whether you’re feeling disconnected from your partner or just want to prevent sex from becoming routine, this episode offers compassionate guidance and actionable strategies for reclaiming the joy and connection that intimate relationships can provide.
Join the SmartSX Membership : https://sexwithemily.com/smartsx
Access exclusive sex coaching, live expert sessions, community building, and tools to enhance your pleasure and relationships with Dr. Emily Morse.
List & Other Sex With Emily Guides: https://sexwithemily.com/guides/
Explore pleasure, deepen connections, and enhance intimacy using these Sex With Emily downloadable guides.
SHOP WITH EMILY!:https: //bit.ly/3rNSNcZ (free shipping on orders over $99)
Want more? Visit the Sex With Emily Website: https://sexwithemily.com/
Let’s get social:
Instagram https://www.instagram.com/sexwithemily/
X https://x.com/sexwithemily
Facebook https://www.facebook.com/sexwithemily
TikTok https://www.tiktok.com/@sexwithemily
Threads https://www.threads.net/@sexwithemily
Let’s text: Sign up here https://sexwithemily.com/text
